Your psychic -1 has forevermore seared its way into the stygian abyss which would otherwise hold my heart if indeed I were foolish enough to mistakenly procure such a notoriously fragile and bothersome organ.
If ever this eternal state of misery you have heaped upon me causes you any undue discomfort, please accept my sympathies and - if you would so deign - re-read my original comment in the apparently confusingly obvious context in which it was intended. That is, addressing the Colbert Report character
and not the actor-comedian. ;)