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Whats up, Shirtlord?
Whats up, Shirtlord?

Shirtlords's posts

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So a monkey is smoking a joint in a tree. A bear walks up and says, "Hey monkey, what are you smoking up there?" The monkey says, "Holy shit. A talking bear!"

So a bear is sitting on the side of a lake smoking a joint. A beaver notices him, swims over and says, "Hey bear, let me hit that joint." The bear looks at him and says, "Alright, tell you what. You can hit this, but you gotta hold it in while you swim to the other side of the lake and back before letting it out." The beaver thinks for a second then says, "OK, I can do that." So he hits the joint, dives underwater and starts swimming. He reaches the other side and just can't take it anymore, so he comes up and exhales the whole hit. A hippo just happens to be nearby and smells it, wanders over and says, "Yo beaver, you smokin' weed??" The beaver replies, "Yeah the bear on the other side has a joint." So the Hippo heads to the other side, sees the bear smoking a joint with his back turned. He approaches the bear, taps him on the shoulder. The bear turns around and says, "HOLY SHIT BEAVER, BREATHE OUT!!!!"

A little rabbit is running happily through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint.

The rabbit looks at the giraffe and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You'll feel so much better!"

The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke.

So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!"

The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and coke, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up.

"Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come. Run with us through the beautiful forest and you'll feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and mauls the rabbit.

The giraffe and elephant watch in horror and look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? He was merely trying to help you."

The lion answers, "That little bastard! He makes me run around the forest like a fucking idiot every time he's on ecstasy!"

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#SigmaNu We at HQ salute your honesty and pragmatism. 

Signs that offend those who cannot take a joke have hung from Frat houses in many years past.

F*ck em if they cant take a joke!

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How was your #towelday everybody?

+Jesse Parent I'm a humorist, we make fun of bullshit as a job.  And you and people like you are a humorists dream, as you are amazingly full of shit!

However, it is not my job to insult children. So after reading that comment of yours, I really must apologize, as it shows your development was arrested sometime before 12.

 being said, I know you will take this as an insult, but sincerely: Good luck growing up!

Did you hear about the new pill that's supposed to turn lesbian women straight?

It's called tricoxagain.

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Happy #420 from !

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