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Sarah Pappalardo
Works at Reductress
Attended DePaul University
Lives in New York
368 followers|45,952 views
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Are you home alone right now? Tucked away in your bed, trying to fall asleep, but sort of scared because you keep hearing odd noises? Well, that creak you just heard could be your upstairs neighbors going to the bathroom, but the more likely explanation is that some bad guys are about to sell you into slavery as part of a horrifying human trafficking scheme in Eastern Europe. Here are some sounds that are cause for alarm and will most certainly r...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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It’s easy to make your eyes pop with a metallic eye shadow or some stunning liquid liner. But a face like yours needs more than a smoky eye to even look remotely alive. Too bad you’re incapable of the simplest beauty technique, much less fake eyelashes! These five falsies add an instant touch of glam to your glamourless peepers—that is, if you can get them on straight. (Which you definitely won’t, oops!) Red Cherry Lashes (Sleekh...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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I used to be like you. I used to buy Revlon mascara on discount at CVS and swipe it on before work each morning, batting my brittle lashes as the Adonises of corporate America walked all over me. My brows were untamed and my lipstick shade was ill suited for my skin tone. Frankly, I was a mess. But one fall day, everything changed. Upon finding a Sephora gift card on the street that still had some money on it, I had the idea to get an in-...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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You’re two hours into Tuesday morning and everything already sucks. You haven’t showered, your cat keeps vomiting up green stuff, and right now you’re in a meeting about some quarterly bullshit. You need one thing right now. Wine. But you’re worried it’ll look bad if you rip open a box of red and suckle its wine nozzle teat like a booze-hungry piglet in the middle of the day. The answer? Pair it with some food. Normally, you’d pair your drink wit...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Long Fall weekends were made for scenic drives to charming vineyards. But rustic groves and cozy wine caverns aren’t just for sipping Merlot—they also set the perfect mood for some serious outdoor fucking. After all, you’ll never be more relaxed, or better lit than when you’re drinking booze in the sundrenched countryside without the ability to check your emails. Here are the quaintest grape-houses to hit when you want to fuck like there’s no tom...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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If you’re leasing a racially ambiguous, completely electronic cyborg Boyfriend® with vague political ambitions and a nice Jewish “mother”, it can be irritating when he starts to glitch (especially after that hefty down payment!). How do you know it’s time for a good, old-fashioned defrag? Keep your human eyes peeled for these telltale signs. He starts asking you to pay for things. There’s no reason your cyborg boyfriend should be askin...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Nothing beats the cold better than a hearty bowl of soup, which is why we have five great soup recipes to warm your soul—if you don’t mind eating meat that’s soaking wet. We can understand that some people may not want to put perfectly good meat into a pot filled with liquid; that they may equate that to dropping it into the toilet or a tepid, scummy pond, but we personally find that the addition of meat makes for a tastier soup. Here are some we...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Not every twenty-something single lady falls asleep to the sounds of 30 Rock reruns after a glass or six of wine—some people are legitimately watching television these days. Unfortunately, committing to critically acclaimed shows requires a lot of energy and commitment—commitment to not look at Instagram for at least 44 minutes. Here are some shows that everyone seems to be enjoying, but you probably won’t get around to because it’s just a lot to...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Sometimes your tiny butt has it perks. For instance, when you’re double-buckling in the backseat of your man’s Mini Cooper on the way to his kickball game (Go Brian!!). But when there’s a serious emergency (you have to sing karaoke to Sir Mix-a-Lot), you’ll desperately need some more booty to shake. Luckily, you can feign a big butt in an emergency with these crucial tips: Slide a Wonderbra over your butt. It’s a brutally compet...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Erin Hopkins has always felt confident in her appearance. The 27-year-old elementary school teacher from Boulder Creek, CA has never had the need for much makeup or heavy dieting to feel comfortable in her body. “I’m not Gwyneth Paltrow, but I’ve always felt very comfortable in my own skin,” she says. Then one day, after seeing an article about plastic surgery trends in other countries, Hopkins got curious. “I knew I generally fit the mold...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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I’ve always seen myself as someone who’s in touch with her sexuality. I know what I like. So a few days after the release of the new hit musical Hamilton’s soundtrack on iTunes, when I felt some new urges and changes happening to my body, I became confused. At first, everything seemed normal. I was enjoying the soundtrack and going about my life as usual. But then one night when my boyfriend and I were going at it and I was close to the m...
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Sarah Pappalardo

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Paralegal Linda Hopman has remained silent on a chain of 47 group emails about her leaving gift, which she was accidentally CCed on early today. The initial email was sent out to the litigation team at Lincoln Partners LLC at 9:37 AM this morning by less-efficient HR assistant Abbey Foot, regarding Linda’s imminent departure from the company. Under the subject line “Linda’s leaving fun(d)!”, Abbey asked for leaving gift suggestions and in...
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People
Have her in circles
368 people
Richard Moen's profile photo
Govind Sharma's profile photo
alex aloise's profile photo
Jeff Eckman's profile photo
Bali Activities Tour's profile photo
Alaethia Doctor's profile photo
ASHISH GANDHI's profile photo
Evergrade Interactive's profile photo
Rajkumar Sharma's profile photo
Work
Occupation
Writer, Actor, Interactive Producer
Employment
  • Reductress
    Editor, 2013 - present
  • PlentyNYC
    Producer, 2011 - 2013
Places
Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Currently
New York
Previously
Boston - Chicago
Links
Story
Tagline
writer, performer, interactive producer
Bragging rights
I bust dust.
Education
  • DePaul University
    M.A. English
  • DePaul University
    B.A. English and Communication (TV/Film)
Basic Information
Gender
Female