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Radical Honesty
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Tell the truth to transform your life
Tell the truth to transform your life

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What causes the ongoing persistence of any problem – like recurrent anger at expectations not being met – is trying to avoid certain sensations in your body.

You need to do what you are afraid of, so you can do what you want.

The best instrument for avoiding life is a machine we call a Distracter Tractor—your very own MIND.

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Charles Eisenstein wrote: “Normal is coming unhinged…. The social and environmental horrors likely to be committed under President Trump are likely to incite massive civil disobedience and possibly disorder…. We are entering a time of great uncertainty. Institutions so enduring as to seem identical to reality itself may lose their legitimacy and dissolve…. At such moments, it is a normal response to find someone to blame, as if identifying fault could restore the lost normality, and to lash out in anger. Hate and blame are convenient ways of making meaning out of a bewildering situation…."

Read the rest of Charles, Tom Atlee and Brad's discussion here:

http://radicalhonesty.com/2017/02/15/the-good-news-and-the-bad-news-is-that-things-are-not-always-as-they-appear/

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As you continue to practice radical honesty, learning to take care of ourselves CREATIVELY rather than resentfully is a big step in growing up. When we take such good care of ourselves that we have all we need, the overflow to generosity with others is possible.

Prior to that, nurturing relationships between or among adults are not possible...The primary, fundamental, essential, baseline, critical, lowest-level minimum requirement for happiness without which there is no other hope is: A WILLINGNESS TO TAKE CARE OF ONESELF.

The trouble is, people are generally willing to take care of almost anyone or anything BUT themselves. They will take care of a car, house, child, job, pet, boss, deadline, spouse, stranger before they take care of themselves.

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We conceal ourselves because we fear that the pain accompanying the act of self-disclosure will literally destroy us, or fundamentally damage our being in some horrible way, rendering us maimed and dysfunctional.

In addition, we fear we may destroy others with our truth-telling...but telling the truth kills nothing but false roles, images, interpretations, and lies…deceits we have kept alive through strategic self-concealment...

Through radical honesty and telling the truth, you reveal yourself and can deliver yourself and your loved ones into a new and more powerful relationship.

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Judgments like, "I'm too tired," "I can't take it anymore," "It's not worth the struggle," and "I've got to get out of this place," are products of INCOMPLETE DISCLOSURE of feelings towards, and thoughts about, others.

Can you think of examples of this in your own life? Or maybe times when you had those kind of thoughts, but overcame them by telling the truth?

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Radical honesty, though scary, can’t be worse than the known murderous consequences of lying. We are each other’s laboratory mates in an ongoing human experiment. We need each other to report honestly what is really going on with us the best we can tell, or we will suffocate in all the bullshit we generate by avoiding being straight with each other. So far, that is what we are destined to do.

Do something to change that if you can. I suggest you start practicing Radical Honesty and invite everyone you know to be radically honest with you as well. Maybe this could catch on.

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Through secrecy and lying we kill people by the thousands every day. And we will kill ourselves off completely as a species if we keep attempting to control and manipulate each other by our myriad ways of lying with all three of our minds.

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Brad was at the Women's March last Saturday. Still protesting after 50+ years! * FIGHT FASCISM!*
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Most of us think the “avoiding the truth” kind of trouble is the way to get to intimacy in relationships because that is what we have been taught all of our lives. Big mistake! One of the biggest! Just another bullshit thought that caught on!

Lying, particularly through withholding, secrecy, phony politeness, etc. is a killer.

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The reason we usually choose to not tell the truth is to avoid some kind of trouble. We lie to avoid trouble. The trouble with avoiding trouble is that you cause more trouble by avoiding trouble than the trouble you had in the first place!

Lots of times the trouble we worry about never happens. But sometimes trouble really might happen if we tell a particular truth. Go ahead! Life is trouble! Lying gets you in trouble. Honesty gets you in trouble. When you have three minds, life is trouble! The question then becomes “What is the best kind of trouble?”

And the answer is that the trouble that comes from honesty is the best trouble. Not only is it more fun, more easily handled, much more easily shared—it makes it possible to get some help figuring out how your mind has been interpreting incorrectly. When you are lying for the sake of self-protection, you can’t get any of the kind of help from others that you need—vital feedback for the quality of your life and theirs as well.

In personal relationships, by making the trouble from telling the truth, we actually end up with relationships that are real, lasting, authentic, and intimate.

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