Baby Boxes Are Awesome and Surrendering Moms Are Heroes
I saw this story and thought, "Wait, those have been around for awhile, is this really news to anyone?" http://www.mothering.com/articles/baby-boxes-safer-way-surrender-child/
But apparently it is news to some people that in some places in the world, there are safe, monitored ways for an unwanted baby to be dropped off so it can be cared for.
And apparently some people are offended by this, in particular because some of the groups who run some of these things are anti-abortion groups. But I'd frankly rather see anti-abortion groups doing more exactly like this
to support mothers and babies where the mother has either chosen
or been required to give birth, rather than have these groups out attacking women making a different choice earlier in the pregnancy. Too many anti-abortion groups only give a crap about a fetus until it's born; these groups are showing that they legitimately care about the resulting baby, and I can respect them for that part of their work, at least.
Apparently other people are upset that this unfair to the babies who won't know about their birth parents. Um...yeah, okay, but you know what's worse for a baby than not knowing about its birth parents? Dying a multi-day slow painful death of cold and starvation. Robin will probably never know anything about her birth father and will know very little about her birth mother. Pretty sure she's glad her birth mother had her in a hospital and listened to her own mother about calling an adoption agency instead of just walking away. And even if she had just walked away, that still would have been better than having the baby in some hidden way and leaving her to die somewhere. Robin is alive and thriving (and throwing an unrelated tantrum) right now because her birth mom surrendered her safely.
Birth mothers who surrender babies to hospitals, baby boxes, or other safe means need to be supported and applauded, not derided, not harassed for interacting with anti-abortion groups, not interrogated.
Would it be better if everyone had access to proper birth control so unwanted pregnancies never happened? HELL YES. Is that the world we live in? HELL NO. Would it be a better world if every mother could feasibly care for her baby, including those who a wider society devalues (ie girl babies) or will require a tremendous amount of care (ie severely disabled babies)? HELL YES. Again, is that the realistic world we live in? NOPE. So stop blaming mothers who maturely, rationally realize they can't cope
Those who decry the baby box need to get over themselves, stop concern trolling, and check their privilege. Parenting is really, really fucking hard. Parenting while poor is so much harder. Parenting alone is so much harder. Parenting in a social situation that will punish you for having had sex/pregnancy is so so so much harder. Parenting a disabled child without support and a fully paid health care system is so so so much harder. These moms who surrender babies are HEROES for doing it.
And until such time as we see fit to actually fix misogyny, health care, and poverty, STFU and put in more baby boxes. Make this easier and safer.
That's called being a human being. #adoption #choice #parenting #mothering