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Michael Baker
Attended L'Academie de Cuisine
Lives in Gaithersburg, MD
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Michael Baker

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My Hero!

Remember when I said +Bo Fisher was going to be The Green Lantern (the newest, a la Earth 2)? Then we decided there wasn't time to accomplish that task before he headed off to C2E2 this weekend. That was six weeks ago, when we didn't have time. Two days ago, somebody decided he absolutely had to have a costume (probably because his buddy's costume is awesome, so I can't blame him.)

This is Bo's first cosplay, my first attempt at anything superhero, and it was accomplished in 36 hours, including some sleep. Other than the spandex suit, which still had to be heavily modified, it's all built from scratch. I have to say, I think it came out pretty well. Most importantly, he loves it, if you can't tell by the look on his face. 

I learned a few very important things, which I will share below for those interested:

1) Comic Artists - Please get your shit together when it comes to consistency in portraying your characters' costumes, dimensions, etc... Okay, fine, I know you're not actually doing this for us, but seriously. Can we bring the medium back to something slightly more reasonable?

2) Craft Foam - You are the bomb. After being thrown into your use trial-by-fire style to make armor, you please me. I have learned your features and limitations, and I will use you again soon.

3) Automotive Paint Is super awesome for metallic colors with rich pigment, but requires sunlight to look its best, and bright light to look good - Otherwise, it looks very dark.

4) The Artist Formerly Known as Future, aka Pledge Tile Finish -- I have no idea how you work on floors, but you are amazing at shining up craft foam armor. Your reputation is not overstated.

5) Mod Podge - I'm not sure you're anything more than watered down PVA, but without you, none of this would have been possible. You are to craft foam what gesso is to canvas. (Or are you gesso? Or are gesso and PVA all the same? Mankind may never know...)
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I used simple craft acrylic but did the same method. Layers of brush and blotting with grey and browns and then I watered down the metalic silver and did the all over paint and wipe.
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Michael Baker

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Have you warned your children about the dangers of fish bladder and the same NATURAL red food coloring that is in every damn thing ?  

Oh, you haven't? But organic everything is better. It's natural  ... just like the red dye you're having a fit over, and the "natural flavors" you're decrying. How about a delicious mixture of Copper and Sulfuric Acid? Oh wait, no, that is an approved organic fungicide, despite it's high level of toxicity (LD50 of 470 mg/kg) compared to something like Actigarda conventional fungicide, with a much lower level of toxicity (LD50 of >5000 mg/kg). And before you get up on me about dosage, typical organics require about twice as much chemical to be effective. Enjoy your no-name organic beer, kay?

I'm tired of pseudoscience, and I'm sickened that people I take for educated read and share this kind of thing with full faith in its contents. How do you kooks sleep at night?
Many of us choose what we eat very carefully, or at least dedicate our minimum attention to it. But when it comes to drinks, especially alcoholic beverages, we do little to make the best decisions for our health. Here are some harmful ingredients that are commonly found in beer: GMO Corn Syrup GMO Corn High Fructose […]
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+Michael Baker Mmm delicious salty MSG. Yum! 
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On Flan for Breakfast

A bit back, I made homemade Flan for +Bo Fisher , like you do, and we ended up having a conversation about the nutritional merits of nontraditional (from the USAian standpoint) breakfast foods. I have never like breakfast cereals, really, though you can occasionally get a toaster strudel in me. At any rate, my experience as both a pastry chef and a longtime fatass has led me to realize that like everything, healthfulness is how you spin it. So, below, find a comparison of 1 serving of my flan (1/8 of a pie dish) and a normal human serving of Honey Nut Cheerios (1.5 cups) with 2% milk (1/2 c.).

For your convenience, I have marked all of the ways in which Flan wins because you should want reasons to have flan instead of processed human feed. Cholesterol and Sugars are marked yellow because, while Flan has more of both, I find this part of labeling exceptionally manipulative. Dietary cholesterol is essential to proper function of the body, and only a concern to those people who have specifically identified concerns with it. Reducing cholesterol intake in healthy people has a detrimental effect. Sodium is the same, though it's unlikely anyone in the USA eating a lower to middle class diet has any issues with not enough sodium.  

All carbohydrates turn into sugar as far as your body is concerned, and many before they even hit the gut - having been broken down by saliva - so unless you're calculating the glycemic impact of foods, this is largely irrelevant. Notice that the cereal has 8g more of carbohydrates but only 4g more of fiber - this means it really just has 4g more of what will very shortly become sugar. 

Where our processed human feed wins out, of course, is the micronutrients the FDA has classed as "important" which is to say those we can easily fortify into goods like Cheerios. My position? I'll take the Flan and a Centrum any day, because if you're this worried about your nutrition, you're probably taking a multivitamin already and those big robust micronutrient counts are totally irrelevant except for curb appeal. 
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no game to it. Just facts
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Michael Baker

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It's breaking ice now to make any movement.

I can't sleep, no, not like I used to.
I can't breathe in and out like I need to.
It's breaking ice now to make any movement.
What's your vice? You know that mine's the illusion.

All at once, (As I'm trying)
I can help you out, (just to keep things right.)
I'll be what you need, (I'll kill myself to make)
I'll do anything, (everything perfect for you.)
Goodbye apathy. So long, apathy. 

I don't walk right, not like I used to.
There's a jump in my step as I rush to see you.
I could be happy here,
As long as you're near to me,
As long as you're close to me.

So don't you stop pushing me.
I can take so much.
Goodbye, apathy (As I'm trying)
So long, fancy free (just to keep things right.)
Goodbye, apathy (I'll kill myself to make)
I don't wanna be (everything perfect for you.)
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Uuugghhh.. super cute standees! Go buy things. #shutupandtakemymoney  
I sort of became addicted to making the standing #zombies  and other characters ... like this dragon. I'm adding them to my shop today ...
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Have him in circles
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Michael Baker

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Wohoo! These look good. :)

Now I, as well, have gotten a present up that I got for my birthday from +Michael Baker and mom.... Portal mirrors!!!

#bejealous #sorrynotsorry
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#imadethis  +Shaun Burks  >.>
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Michael Baker

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Just faught "Clawgane - The Mountain", a huge fuggin' guy in Diablo. #loveit  
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I am waiting for the PS4 version to drop before I buy it and a PS4.
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Michael Baker

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+Jessie Mullins got this for me last summer (I think? I hope.) and I'm finally getting it on my car. Yay!
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Yay!!!!! Yes it was last summer
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Michael Baker

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YES! This picture is awesome. It was irrelevant to me that it was a girl when I first looked, which means it's extra awesome, because that is totally a girl and I wasn't forced to notice that. Very pleased that she's backed up by a variety of characters, both male and female. I'm uncertain how I feel about the (what seems on examination) intentional omission of traditionally feminine characters, or even non-warlike characters. While I'm glad Chun Li's not there with her Barbie-esque proportions, where's Princess Peach or Zelda rockin' a dress? It's all good if this girl's not into that, but I do wonder. 
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They do the same to me. I used to practice kickboxing in a skirt and heels. Just because :)
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Michael Baker

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Waking Dreams

Last night I had the unique experience of being awake and dreaming at the same time. I was woken up at what was apparently exactly the right moment. Dream imagery continued uninterrupted in my mind, as an overlay or backdrop, depending on which I focused on, while I was fully aware and interacting with the waking world. It was, in short, incredibly awesome.  Evidently this is the polar opposite of that terrifying moment when you're completely awake but still have sleep paralysis.

Photo by Ben Heine. (
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It's always about physiology with the Miguél. 
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Have him in circles
10,941 people
Chef, Pastry Chef, Handsome Little Hate Machine
Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Gaithersburg, MD
Rockville, MD - Lanham, MD - Westminster, MD - Hagerstown, MD
Came down on a bottle rocket, found my heart right where I locked it
Me: An incognito super nerd, with light interest in applied technology, and more substantive interest in things like the technical aspects of pastry, miniatures based wargaming, video games, philosophy, culture and art. 

Work: Food is my profession, so I do my best to keep up to date on all of its myriad aspects, including dietetics, nutrition, politics, and, of course, preparation. If I had a specialty, it would be showpiece work, but, I try to keep myself sharp all around. My current career trend is more in management than production, which is going well and giving me significantly more growth potential. 

Fun: Philosophy, that is to say critical thinking, not that thing people say when they mean idle pontification, is my passion, and for what I was, allegedly, trained. I analyze things because I care about them, which also includes people. I've noticed they don't care for that. 

Theme Parks, Games, and the Outdoors are my innocent fun, if I were to allow myself that. ;)

Also: I like dudes. Like, like dudes. 

Bragging rights
I've fed famous people, lots and lots of them. Eagle Scout. ΟΔΚ. Studied eight languages
  • L'Academie de Cuisine
    Baking & Pastry Arts, 2006
  • McDaniel College
    Philosophy, French, Liberal Arts, Pre-Law, Cultural Anthropology, 2002
  • T.S. Wootton High School
Basic Information
Everyone I have encountered at Larry & Sons has been extremely helpful and professional, from Heather and Nathan in the office, to Rich and John who came on site to help me with several concerns in an old, complex multi-unit property. The technicians were efficient, personable, and professional, leaving me with the greatest confidence in not only their abilities, but the company as a whole. As a result, Larry & Sons is the ONLY plumber I'll be using in Hagerstown after three years of fly-by-night service and sketchy runarounds from other companies.
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Public - 3 weeks ago
reviewed 3 weeks ago
1 review