Life is Hard
I can see that it is good
to be alive, and being alive is better than being dead. Believe me, I am grateful for being here, but the fact remains that everything is difficult.
Dressing, eating, walking. Anything physical (and that is just about everything) is difficult. Will it be difficult forever? Gosh, I sure hope not. But it is difficult now
. 'How?' You might ask. That question becomes, 'How are your symptoms?'
First and foremost, I am connected to my son again. He was cuddling with his mother and I was cuddling with her. It seemed to click for him then--no more screaming at me. I'm his buddy again. He has no idea that I'm different or he does not care. That's something good I can hold onto.
My friends are still my friends. They still hang out with me and value what I say. That's another thing I'm grateful for.
What about physically? My physical therapist gave me a series of exercises to do three times a day. I've graduated past what he normally gives patients, so now we are winging it. I've graduated from wheelchair to walker and now cane. I only use it when going outside--I stumble around at home. It's more about balance than strength.
1. I'm still not driving. I think I could
, but I have yet to try.
2. My left side is getting some feeling in it. It's not regular, but I can feel enough to use my leg, for instance.
3. My double vision has corrected itself for distance and
up close. I still have trouble shifting between the two, which is why I look down when I walk.
4. My left fingertips are still numb, but no longer tingling. The entire hand feels stiff, but it is more fuctional.
5.I can type, but it is slow going. It would be a shame to revert to hunt-and-peck when I just have to get used to it.
6. My face is still 1/2 numb, so I still talk like I have marbles in my mouth. I hope that improves. Luckily, your tongue is mostly redundant so eating is enjoyable.
7. I still choke from time to time, but I would consider my swallow to be fixed (or good enough).
8. I am pushing myself on the computer constantly, but it's still not there
... Reading makes me tired, and my attention is limited.
My daily regimine, I attempt to perform three times daily...
1. Kale shake for breakfast
2. Phyisical therapy exersises (about ten minutes)
3. Occuptional therapy exersises (about ten minutes)
4. Balance exercises on the Wii Balance Board (about ten minutes).
I'll break each of these down in future posts, but I'm about tapped out for this session.
Be well, everybody. If I can do it, you certainly can.