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Luis Pellot
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An Android user review of the Apple fanboy wanking circle non event of today:

Lets sum up the "innovations" vis a vis Android phones...

- blablabla, a bunch of marketoid numbers

- new Cards app. Really? Fuck me, you're going into a business with lots of competitors and "innovating" in a dying paper industry? For 3 dollars a message? You're joking right? Didnt you have something better to show? And to start the presentation?

- notifications now over Wifi+3G and dont interrupt your games. Kinda like the Android phones have had for a couple of years?

- a brand new app is Reminders. You must all be on some kind of strange drugs. A to-do app with notifications? To compete with, lets say, hundreds of free and paid apps in your appstore and in Androids appmarket? This only makes sense if you bought out the largest of those competitors.

- twitter integration. Oh boy what a thrill. Do you mean something like an Android application/twitter intent? But this integrates with ALL the apps. Yours only integrates with your built-in apps, is that it?

- the camera button is now the home button. You mean you cant configure what your home button is? There are hundreds of apps for that. In Android's market.

- say I take a photo; icloud saves it to the cloud. Like Android sync to Google's Picasa? Tell me something new please.

- I can see a list of all the albuns/songs I purchased. You couldnt do that before? Thanks god you're provinding it for free.

- photostream; you can take pictures and they sync to the icloud. The same thing that my 2 year old Android phone has?

- documents created with ipad now sync to the cloud. Great. Thats called Google Docs.

- new app FindMyFriend. Unbeliavable. Are you going to compete with 4square, gowalla and a dozen others? You call that innovation?

- apple is providing 5Gb of free storage. I have 7Gb on Gmail, 1Gb on Google Docs, 1Gb in Picasa and unlimited storage for pics and movies in Google+. All for free. Dont make me laugh.

- now let you track runs and walks. Have you heard of RunKeeper? Please.

- You can have a Mickey Mouse face on the nano. I am going to cum. Not.

Lets delve into the iphone4S features:

- its a dual-core A5. Samsung Galaxy S2 anyone?

- battery time. I'll concede this one. Android's battery usage sucks. Even when you do the management yourself.

- 8 megapixel camera. Just like the HTC Droid Incredible? Wow. Unheard of.

- (a lot of shit about numbers; I thought Apple was all about quality and benefits and not about numbers and features. Guess I waw wrong)

- the camera is 1 second faster that the camera in Droid Bionic. I just hope you didnt select that Android phone as a "tweaked" benchmark. Maybe not.

- HD video recording. Samsung Galaxy SII. Nuff said. But that "temporal noise reduction" thing sounded cool.

- HDMI port. Surely you jest kind sirs. That's Just like Motorola's Droid, Droid X and Atrix.

Delving into Siri:

- for starters, words fail me.

- voice commands. Voice Actions for Android. ... Available since Aug 2010

- voice recognition search. Great. You've copied Google's Voice Search.

- If you ask it “Who are you?” it says, “I am a humble personal assistant.”... Like I said. Words fail me.

- Siri is in beta. Holy cow! I tought you didnt release half-baked products. That that would compromise your standing for quality. But maybe "beta" transmits some sense of "this shit is innovative".

- iphone pricing. Besides having fucked over your customers who bought an iphone4 in the last 6 months, those are great prices. Graded according to memory storage. The thing is, you see, most Android phones have an SD card slot. The users can change the factory storage. They can buy a 64Gb SD card for $84.99 at Amazon.

Final words: “When you look at each of these, they are great and fantastic and industry-leading in and of themselves,”

Cmon. You're just using your alternate reality halo effect and the consensual halucination of your fanboys to pretend that your shit is "industry-leading"although its all copied from previous products.

Take away: it was a non-event. Guess we'll have to wait for the iphone 5 to see which stuff you'll be copying.

@Alabama. Procrastination at its finest. :D

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So fucking true. 

Now playing on Netflix: Boondock Saints. :)
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