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Laurence Simon
Attended Rice U.
Lives in Houston
1,638 followers|322,789 views
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Laurence Simon

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A rose by any other name is still a rose, but we knew her as Circe. Whenever I was being an asshole, she’d call me an asshole. And whenever I wasn’t, she’d still call me an asshole, because she knew it was only a matter of time. She told me she was…
A rose by any other name is still a rose, but we knew her as Circe. Whenever I was being an asshole, she'd call me an asshole. And whenever I wasn't, she'd still call me an asshole, because she kne...
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Laurence Simon

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My friend Hope wishes that someone had told her as a child that she could be a travel writer. Since my time machine is ready to test, I figured I could slip that into my list. “I’ll take care of that right before I kill Hitler,” I said, and I flipped the…
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Laurence Simon

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Welcome to the 100 Word Stories podcast at oneadayuntilthedayidie.com. This is Weekly Challenge, where I post a topic and then challenge you to come up with a 100 word story based on that topic. We’ve got stories by: Tom John Musico Munsi Jeffrey Richard…
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Laurence Simon

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I keep my knife collection in my back and my stamp collection on all these envelopes I keep filling with money to keep you from adding to my knife collection. You bitch. You evil bitch. How much is enough? How long do I have to suffer? You never answer…
I keep my knife collection in my back and my stamp collection on all these envelopes I keep filling with money to keep you from adding to my knife collection. You bitch. You evil bitch. How much is...
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Laurence Simon

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The architect was known for designing absurdly tall buildings, but he was secretly afraid of heights. Ribbon-cutting ceremonies for his completed designs were always held in the lobby, but he would find a reason to duck out before the trip to the…
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Laurence Simon

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Sally runs an aquaculture business. She loves to feed the fish. And she loves to sing to the fish while she feeds them. The food floats on the surface of the pond, and the fish rush to the surface to feed. She tosses them food until they don’t rush to the…
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Laurence Simon

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Some chefs make gnocchi, but I know a chef who makes gnocchi do tricks. Most of the time, he makes the gnocchi do the standard tricks: sit, roll over, and play dead. Even shake hands. But one day, he tried to make the gnocchi make gnocchi. That’s right.…
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Laurence Simon

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The first house I remember had a kitchen with an oven and a toaster. The same with the second house. However, one day, the toaster shorted out, and it was taken away. The next day, there was a toaster oven. I asked what a toaster oven was. “When an oven…
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Laurence Simon

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Hi there. This is Laurence Simon of the 100 Word Stories Podcast at oneadayuntilthedayidie.com. The topic of the next 100 Word Stories Weekly Challenge is KID. Want to give it a try? Write an email to isfullofcrap (at) gmail.com with the subject line of…
Hi there. This is Laurence Simon of the 100 Word Stories Podcast at oneadayuntilthedayidie.com. The topic of the next 100 Word Stories Weekly Challenge is KID. Want to give it a try? Write an email...
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Laurence Simon

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My first furry pet was a guinea pig. I don’t know if it was a boy or girl. And I don’t remember if it had a name. It lived in a monkey cage in the room I shared with my brother. I wasn’t allowed to open the cage to pet the thing. And I have […]
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Laurence Simon

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Poor people couldn’t afford to go to their family doctor for minor issues, so they went to the Emergency Room at the county hospital. Then, they ignored the bill from the hospital. The county funded a set of neighborhood clinics to deal with this problem,…
Poor people couldn't afford to go to their family doctor for minor issues, so they went to the Emergency Room at the county hospital. Then, they ignored the bill from the hospital. The county funde...
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Laurence Simon

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I listened to the ghost of David Rakoff read his latest, final book. David Rakoff is a brilliant writer, but he’s also a brilliant performer, so his audiobooks are what I get. Got. I remembered that his book was available as I left the office, but iTunes…
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Have him in circles
1,638 people
Kyle Chalice's profile photo
Michael Gorham's profile photo
Takako Ferraris's profile photo
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Cath Blackfeather's profile photo
christopher peay's profile photo
Erma Tijerina's profile photo
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Wendz Tempest's profile photo
Work
Occupation
Tech Drone, Writer
Places
Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Currently
Houston
Previously
Chicago - Westerville, OH
Story
Tagline
aka R. Crap Mariner and SecondLie in Second Life
Introduction

Laurence Simon is a 40-something technical writer for a delightful software company. (He used to say "30-something, where something is more than 10" but he needs to be a lot more accurate about his writing these days. Darn.)

If you want to hear what he sounds like, why not check his daily podcast for some amusing 100-word stories. Every week, the Weekly Challenge brings in other writers to come up with their own stories based on a topic of his choosing.

You can find him wandering around Second Life as R Crap Mariner, a deranged windup surrounded by an aura of whirling gears on Edloe island, and the rest of the Five Islands Group.

Of, if you're into that Twitter thing, he's at @isfullofcrap and @100wordstories.


(Profile icon by Strawberry Singh of SL)

Bragging rights
Built first web site for a TV station in the world back in 1994. Most episodes of any independently-produced podcast in the world. Not much since.
Education
  • Rice U.
Basic Information
Gender
Male
Other names
Laurence Simon, Crap Mariner, Mr. Crap
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