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Kelly Barnes
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Kelly Barnes

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This is how it's done.
 
Howdy Texas ENL Hunters! I present to you an ordered list of my guardians and some helpful tips! No ENL scraping needed. Keep it clean out there!
I am quite confident you are going to fail this round. I am looking forward to flaunting my shiny new onyx soon. When you admit defeat and finally spoof them, I will laugh at you.
#NotGHT   #NotGhostfacedkillaz #NotHashashin #statsopen  
Stats say oldest is 140. It’s time to move. Good luck agents! Kisses,
omgkitties


+Hisham Eid +Solo Walka +gupp gupp +Chris Shelton +The HuK +Murphy Wilson +Daniel Rodriguez +Cory Maddox +Sue Dyatlov +Nancy Something +Mike Heeringa +Dan Funderburke +Jon Harmon +Mason Sheppard 
CC:ed for lulz
+Adam B +Cyanidesin Savage 

Google Docs and text for your convenience.
https://docs.google.com/document/d/1dcwiEhpFABPSy0aizqAnHeIUsiiDKJ-WIEzHCgU-X6Y/edit?usp=sharing

Over 130 days (20 or less days left)
From Desert to High Peaks - should be pretty in the summer. http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.461683,-108.517958&pll=37.461683,-108.517958
Rico Public Library
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.694232,-108.030418&pll=37.694232,-108.030418
Atlantic Cable Mine Ore Silo - Not nearly as much snow as when I capped it.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.694423,-108.03177&pll=37.694423,-108.03177
San Juan National Forest Information Station - who is your cell provider? Ohh noes!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.711802,-108.034132&pll=37.711802,-108.034132
Ah Has Art School
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.937048,-107.816031&pll=37.937048,-107.816031
The Alpine Chapel
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.937334,-107.813871&pll=37.937334,-107.813871
Historic Telluride Delicate Arch - gonna probably have to do some walking
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.935406,-107.807529&pll=37.935406,-107.807529
Christ Church Telluride
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.938845,-107.814146&pll=37.938845,-107.814146
Down Valley Park - got to love what mountain valleys do to cell signals!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=37.998787,-108.034923&pll=37.998787,-108.034923 R&R BBQ Shack - portal yes, but might wanna pass on the bbq.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.455846,-100.949516&pll=29.455846,-100.949516 <small>Near Site, Southern Pac Who uses HTML tags really.. Lots of truckers at night.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.765756,-101.386364&pll=29.765756,-101.386364
US Post Office - Might be a good place to send your
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.807232,-101.557119&pll=29.807232,-101.557119
The Torres Family - Wave to Mexico!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.8085,-101.559266&pll=29.8085,-101.559266
Langtry Art Cow Gas up before it gets too late. It is a long drive.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.81329,-101.569718&pll=29.81329,-101.569718
Dryden Intermediate Field Site 29 - i may or may not have 45 keys to this portal.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.052958,-102.213425&pll=30.052958,-102.213425
Far West Texas Wildlife Trail
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.143489,-102.400765&pll=30.143489,-102.400765 100-130 range (Over 20 days Left)
Fort Peña Colorado (Red Rock)
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.15337,-103.28763&pll=30.15337,-103.28763
The U.S. Army Camel Experiment .probably gonna have to get out of your car.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.742849,-103.160848&pll=29.742849,-103.160848
Double Mills probably gonna have to get out of your car.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.74281,-103.160806&pll=29.74281,-103.160806
Terlingua Abaja - supposed to be Abajo with an o.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.198002,-103.60353&pll=29.198002,-103.60353 Luna's Jacal This one was substituted’s portal for a while. Jacal loosely means house
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.215594,-103.53485&pll=29.215594,-103.53485
Marfa Water Tower -omgmarfa!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.314653,-104.020977&pll=30.314653,-104.020977
North Marfa Water Tower marfakitties
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.319808,-104.020418&pll=30.319808,-104.02041
McDonald Observatory - Totally gonna BAF austin with this one after 150..
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.671245,-104.0236&pll=30.671245,-104.0236 Baxter's Curve Train Robbery - have fun!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.062022,-102.269121&pll=30.062022,-102.269121
Lost Mine Trail - Never saw a lost mine, maybe you will have more luck.
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.274376,-103.286439&pll=29.274376,-103.286439
Trinity Lutheran Church Of Blanco Street Sign
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=30.091638,-98.375436&pll=30.091638,-98.375436
Wimberley Zipline Adventures hi obersdrei!
http://www.ingress.com/intel?ll=29.968444,-98.101853&pll=29.968444,-98.10185
Drive
Hello Texas ENL HuntersHello Texas ENL Hunters! It’s time to move. I present to you an ordered list of my guardians and some helpful tips! No ENL scraping needed. Let’s keep it clean out there! I am quite confident you are going to fail this round. I am looking forward to flaunting my shiney new onyx soon. When you a...
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Perfect.
 
My first trip to Ikea

I asked G+ what they thought of Ikea last week, and based on the response I decided to go to a store and actually touch the bookcases I was buying instead of just ordering from their website. For me, this meant driving (something I don't like doing) nearly 40 minutes to a part of the state I don't spend a lot of time in. Every time I tried going after work I found rush hour traffic had doubled the drive time, so I waited for a Saturday so I could go during the day.

I got there around 1pm, which according to Google was the start of a 2 hour climb to the busiest part of the day for this store. The parking lot was already near capacity, and there was some strange delay getting into the area that I had initially dismissed as traffic. By the time I had entered the store, it was nearly 1:30.

The first thing I saw as I walked in was a pair of big signs, one for a restaurant and one for some kind of play area for kids. Off to the left I saw a smaller sign guiding people to the shopping area, but it was clear food was the first thing you were expected to do. I hadn't eaten, so I decided to check it out. The menu seemed fairly basic, and like the rest of Ikea it was sprinkled with things from the homeland. I grabbed some meatballs and a seasonal drink I didn't recognize, thinking even if it wasn't great it'd be different. In fact, it was awful. The meatballs were basically cheap grocery store meatballs and the drink was artificial hops and carbonation, which basically tasted like soda water and dirt with a little sugar tossed in because they could. My daughter had chicken tenders and French fries, and I was legitimately jealous.

When we finally started shopping, I noticed maps to the store everywhere. The map is essentially a winding maze, taking you through each of the major product categories and ending, I assumed, at the checkout. Logic guided me towards storage, and armed with a shopping cart I joined the flow of traffic towards that destination. Ikea shopping carts are amazing. All four wheels swivel, so naturally navigating corners is super easy if you're paying attention. Many of my fellow shoppers clearly did not feel the same way. Any deviation from a straight line caused confusion, and most of this maze was turns through well lit and colorful display models for everything imaginable. That is, everything but bookshelves.

After 15 minutes of searching, I asked someone where they were hiding the dimension pocket that held all the big furniture. The employee pointed back to the beginning of the maze, where a set of stairs would take me to where I wanted to go. It was here that I discovered many of my fellow Ikea maze runners had no idea how to handle oncoming traffic. Several shoppers just sort of stopped and stared at me, I can only assume because the fear associated with moving their carts in a direction other than forward had frozen them in place. Out of pity, we navigated around them and spoke softly to avoid further disruption to their experiences in the store.

Sure enough, there was a whole are dedicated to large furniture. This area wasn't outlined on the map because it was on a different floor, according to the next employee I found. Nevermind that I still haven't seen a sign that told me this was where big furniture lived, I had arrived and was now certain this was the bookshelf set I wanted. I pointed to the bookshelf and asked for two, and the employee explained I needed to go pick up the pieces from the self pickup area. It turns out the end of the downstairs shopping maze is a massive warehouse full of all the things you saw on display in the maze, and you basically roam the warehouse looking for the name of the things you wanted. Fortunately, my shelves were named Billy so I figured that wouldn't be hard to find.

Just kidding, Billy is the name of an entire line of shelves. What I wanted was Billy xxx.xxx.xx, and the numbers that sit in place of those x's are printed at 1/4 the font size as Billy on the tag. 15 minutes wandering up and down the same aisle finally ended in finding the numbers I wanted. Success! These boxes are a little too big for the cart I chose, but Ikea has nice flat carts just for this occasion. And they're located at the opening, which I can only get to by making my way back through the maze against the flow of traffic. My fellow shoppers remain confused and alarmed at my backwards ways, but at long last I have everything needed to purchase these bookshelves.

The flat cart I chose has the same wheels as the shopping carts, but under the not insignificant weight of these boxes my nimble future cart felt more like the lumbering starter craft from Elite: Dangerous. Every move required a counter to fight inertia, and you can forget going fast. My fellow shoppers are unsympathetic, as like me they can now see the checkout counters and I think there's a prize of some kind if you get there first. I was never going to lumber my way there fast, but that didn't stop several others with loads similar to mine make the attempt. On a related note, I now know why the support pillars are surrounded by crush-proof bins filled with toys and cloth products.

Checking out at Ikea means choosing one of roughly 20 lanes and standing in line until you can put things on the conveyor belt. The 8 lanes in the middle are clearly marked "10 items or fewer" on bright yellow signs, and like any other store with these signs there are people who ignore them. At this Ikea, one cashier in particular had taken it upon herself to police her line. She'd eyeball the line while checking someone out, and if she counted more than 10 items the woman would loudly proclaim you needed to leave her line and go elsewhere. One person refused, and in response the cashier stopped working entirely and instead stared the guy down. The other people in line turned and did the same, and after a moment of silent judgement the man moved to an appropriate lane. Everyone in line celebrated the victory with the cashier.

At the end of the checkout counter there's a pull canister for soft drinks, as though you're at a fast food restaurant. That's because after you finish checking out, there's a fast food restaurant with a series of fridges selling everything from candy to the meatballs they were serving upstairs. As my stomach had not yet settled from the abomination I'd consumed earlier, I went out into the parking lot to find my car and go home.

At the exit there's a series of parking spots for people who have partners that can pull the car around to make unloading your cart easier, which would be cool if this stretch of road wasn't also the main drag in and out of the area and the volume of people lead to some drivers deciding their turn was next so it was cool to just stop behind everyone filling their vehicles. The combination of vehicles parked where they shouldn't be and people in a hurry to go nowhere made navigating the parking lot with my clumsy, lumbering cart and an 11 year old fill my mind with all sorts of fun new words I wasn't quite ready to share with my daughter. As I reached the aisle the van was parked in someone rolled down their window with music playing and shouted "WHERE YOU PARKED? YOU PARKED FAR? I'M TAKE YOUR SPOT." and slowly tailed me to our destination.

In short, I'm really glad Ikea has a website. 
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George Hotz built a  #SelfDrivingCar that runs on #Ubuntu ! Read the +Bloomberg Business story to see it in action.
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So much gold.
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Turn the speakers up and let go...  
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Have him in circles
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Kelly Barnes

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What could go wrong?? Seriously, all it needs is an oscillation overthruster. 
Boeing Boss built by Seth Kettleman at TransTurbine. This go kart is powered by a Boeing 502-12 Gas Turbine engine in custom turbojet configuration. This land-jet produces over 300 pounds of thrust...
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Hey +Raj Wurttemberg, found these in my basement. 
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Love it! Let me know if you want to get rid of those. :)
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Tractor-Man Baby. #APIYH #Techfoolery
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Crazy. Yea, I'd post his picture at the bus yard. :)
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Really?
 
Frustrated Chris Johnson hopes Braves trade him
Braves third baseman Chris Johnson didn’t complain publicly for three months while he played sparingly, relegated to starts mostly against left-handers in a year when the Braves have faced far fewer lefties than usual.
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Have him in circles
117 people
Silvio Zanatta's profile photo
khokhar bhai's profile photo
ashwani khatel's profile photo
Stacy Preston's profile photo
Julie Thomas's profile photo
Julie Labbe's profile photo
Jeremy Hodges's profile photo
Julie Daellenbach's profile photo
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Food was OK, please ask me before you drown my BBQ with sauce. Good meat doesn't require it.
Public - in the last week
reviewed in the last week
My kids love this place.
Public - a month ago
reviewed a month ago
A hole in the ground would have been preferable to stopping here to use the restroom. Wow. Seriously, just wow.
Public - 6 months ago
reviewed 6 months ago
22 reviews
Map
Map
Map
Brand new hotel. The staff is super nice and the amenities are great. If you're coming to the Quad Cities, I'd definitely recommend staying here. They're still finishing the landscaping and exterior stuff (grill area, ect..), but it didn't affect our stay.
Public - a month ago
reviewed a month ago
Good place to shop, but the check out lines are always long. Takes a long time to pay and leave.
Public - 4 months ago
reviewed 4 months ago
Sometimes, you just want a good burger. Five Guys makes an awesome one.
Public - 6 months ago
reviewed 6 months ago