Please hold, Jonathan is standing by to answer your call...actually, he
might be sitting, running, lying down, or any assortment thereof.
Disclaimer: Responding (or lack thereof) to him is not a requirement to
be his friend, but how bad could it be? Further messages may and will
apply. His opinions will probably not reflect those of your own, but
viewer's discretion is nevertheless ill-advised. Contact him 24/7 (or
whenever he's awake for more sensible information and/or conversations).
Although not entirely by my own admission, I was not withstanding born
to my ONLY parents (it's such a sad story...it would make you cry if I
told you), raised up in a loving, godly home. When time came for
kindergarten, Little Harvard University's admissions committee evaluated
me as too fidgety to sit any length of time to learn, let alone
graduate with honors. So mom took up the call and began the daunting
journey of homeschooling (and started a 'year' ahead of my grade level I
might add) starting all the way from sparkly kindergarten and surviving
as a war-torn veteran at high school.
Although they were there
to help any way they could, it was up to me to begin taking an
initiative to learn most of my high school level subjects by myself
without any tutelage outside of books (sadly, ChaCha couldn't have
helped me successfully cheat on my exams even if I wanted to...talk
about PTA repercussions if I did). Thankfully I had help with (and
thanks to) science (mom), Spanish (friend's mom), and
speech/poetry/Shakespeare (grandfather), PE (group tennis instructor/
bowling companions), art (group instructor), and music (dad / guitar
instructor). My best, although most difficult and aggravating subject in
school was, without a doubt, arithmetic. It was difficult and arduous
studying without others to inquire information for some subjects, but I
survived and continued that workaholic nature. In my senior year, I even
took on Physics as an elective to learn as much as I could about the
"science that explains all sciences".
I began coding in the
not-so-simple-for-a-12-year-old BASIC computer programming language
(inspired thanks to yet my other grandfather) eventually delving into
web development at age 15 (boy, I can still remember how excited I was
to make a "Hello World!" page...what an idiot I was...now I've learned
it's even more fun to make "Goodbye Cruel World!" pages...). These
skills began guiding me to my professional interest.
knew it, I was revving up engines on wheels and college was upon me. Of
course, the smartest thing for someone living in a middle-class home,
not really having taken or experienced lots of raw-world big-classroom
education, and not wanting to pay off student loans the rest of my
death, I decided with little doubt that IVY Tech was the right pick for
So off I screech into the last reserved parking space on my
first day of school (yeah...I'll admit, I felt like the kid who gets on
the school bus for the first time). Not sure what to expect
(instructors walking around with police batons ready to bash you in the
head at the first sign of failure) just to find out that my math class
was easier than my high school pre-calculus (and a nice instructor by a
name that phonetically sounded like "cha ching") and English with an
ex-kindergarten teacher who was nice enough to teach me in 16 weeks what
I had lacked comprehending for several years past.
Then I took
another couple of semesters-- [ Fast Forward >> ] --enjoyed
speech class even though-- [ Fast Forward >> ] --because I really
had an amazing group of IT instructors-- [ Fast Forward >> ]
--setting up my resume with career services. My first real semester of
databases was upon me, and I had never done anything outside of
Microsoft Access, but I was willing and ready to learn, burn and die, if
necessary. It was fun for once getting through a 16 week course (Oracle
SQL query command line) in 8 weeks. I was doing pretty good until I
hooked up an internship with a local church, which ironically started at
almost exactly that 9 week mark. All the while, I was trying to hold
together a student organization, having been elected by a severe lack of
competitors, to the position of president out of the necessity that we
needed a student holding the position to make the college happy. There
were a couple bumps in the road, but we made do.
time! Grade A, 4.0...how? I learned a lot at IVY Tech, and I must say
that I give them high credit where credit is due. I don't want to be a
fly on the wall in a huge university, I didn't need 'Yale' on my
Associates. Meanwhile, it was time to find me a job. With a little soul
searching and a lot of depressing job hunting, I went to the IVY Tech
career fair. Met a few people like (we'll leave their name anonymous for
now) this Q/A texting company. Followed up on a couple other leads
afterwards but no luck.
A couple months go by in the long, hot,
dog days of summer. You see, baby, I was working the joint at Joe's,
but nobody had any real good detective cases to follow up on. Then I got
the phone call. Actually, it was an email, but that just sounded cooler
like from a NYT best selling thriller. That Q/A texting company from
the job fair had a position and was curious if I was interested. I said
"yes", went into the interview, and came out with a job at ChaCha
Search. Wow, I wish all professional jobs were as easy to get as swiping
your credit card at Wal-mart (which isn't so easy I might add).
For some people at this point in their lives they start experimenting
with drugs, alcohol, etc., but for me, I thought it was wise and high
time to try implementing something progressively and socially new into
the world, and hopefully far less unhealthy: puns. Yeah, I became a
punnatic at work to the 'SMH-ing' of my coworkers. It wasn't long before
all I could do was smoke words. At about the same time my boss
nicknamed me "J Law" after adjusting to job requirements that had
changed slightly, giving me a more 'accusing' role where I would "lay
down the law."
One day, someone decided they had enough of my
terrible puns and didn't want to be the only one to suffer. So as such,
it was fitting to record a video and post it for Guides to
see...semi-success. Since then, I've use some of my spare time to
generate a JLAW following to help promote social media such as ChaCha.
If this was the worlds of Star Wars, Jonathan would be the peanut butter
and Jedi and JLAW would be on the semi-sweet dark chocolate and yes,
he's on the nuts, side. Add in a few hilariously random impromptu stage
acts (or at least I get some laughs at me), and you won't know what hand
you should have used to hit yourself with. Yeah, I'm that good.
I continue to educate myself at WGU for my BS, all the while the world
continuously advances with new equipment and procedures. We are forced
to keep up on it. As Shakespeare once said, "On this…sea we are now
afloat, and we must take the tide as it serves, else, lose our venture."
But wait. There's more. For an unlimited time only, not only do you get
to witness the fore mentioned hobbies at some point in your life that
makes me a "unique" squeak-in-the-floor, but if you read on, I have more
Of course, my life is not made up of just computer
piranhabytes, and textbooks; it ranges far and wide, from old to new,
serious to fun. Reading classic/mystery novels has always been a
pastime. In sports, I've always enjoyed a good game of tennis and a high
handicap in bowling. I play the acoustic guitar/ukelele, harmonica and
piano, and thoroughly enjoy to sing opera/jazz/choir baritone (it's also
fun mimicking classic dead artists like Dean Martin). I also enjoy
composing tunes/lyrics on my guitar.
Although classical music
has been regarded as my original forte, my genres have expanded through
(currently) '60's (except in a rare few cases like Michael Buble), with
classic rock 'n roll of the '50's as my 'fav' followed by '40-'50's
jazz-vocal and big band.
In addition to my love for music, I
also love to recite (the not so much typically boring) poetry, although
it's become rusty with a lack of time to keep it up. It gives me and
(hopefully) others entertainment when there's nothing else to do (my
Grandfather is an excellent speaker and has passed some of his tips on).
I enjoy debating subjects, regardless of my familiarity with them. It
may sound as though I'm perhaps bias but my primary goal is to advocate a
voice for the minority and always feel sorry for the underdog (if you
pick point A. I'll defend point B. and vise verse). It's in my nature to
be different than the rest of the crowd.
As connected as I
might be with the computer, I believe I could survive without computer
technology more than most of my age or younger who have been raised
holding a piece of technology or going through high school without
Facebook. I can't stand it when people excessively use text messaging
lingo (mostly it wouldn't be a problem, but nobody knows how to type
properly these days because of it, and it will thus ruin the English
language). Although it is likely fun to do, this photography hobbyist
will tell you to please ask someone else to take the picture of you and
your friends, because it just doesn't look as good when you take a
snapshot of yourselves whilst holding the camera. Not to mention, that
every time you do, you take the risk of getting shot, blowup, framed,
and hung. Pleasant thoughts!
Ultimately, at the end of the
day, I thank God where he's placed me, what he's given me, and what
he's done to save me from eternal fire 'n brimstone (seriously though,
let your heart be saved if you ain't...this free gift is even easier to
get than sending in a rebate check and it's worth an eternity, not just a
lousy $5; just admit that you've broken his commandments and unlock
your heart so that your record will be wiped clean forever). I only pray
that I can continue to strive in Him and let loose these worldly things
that yet so tempts me as it does all of us every day of our lives.