Please do read the full answer. Pure horror.
The best Stackoverflow answer to "how do I parse my HTML with RegEx?"

sample: "[...]The force of regex and HTML together in the same conceptual space will destroy your mind like so much watery putty. If you parse HTML with regex you are giving in to Them and their blasphemous ways which doom us all to inhuman toil for the One whose Name cannot be expressed in the Basic Multilingual Plane, he comes.[...]"
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