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Johi Kokjohn-Wagner
Attended University of Northern Iowa
Lives in Colorado
190 followers|2,142,506 views
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Johi Kokjohn-Wagner

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Things no one should ever have to say
When I step back from the context of pretty much any given situation in my life, I'm often appalled by what actually fell out of my mouth. Here is a quick rundown of things no one should ever have to say- except I said them- from the past two weeks: 1. Stop...
When I step back from the context of pretty much any given situation in my life, I'm often appalled by what actually fell out of my mouth. Here is a quick rundown of things no one should ever have to say- except I said them- from the past two weeks: 1. Stop playing with your brother's buttcheeks ...
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Pony verses Horse: What's better for my child?
Finding a hobby that the entire family enjoys can be difficult. And no, staring at the television does not count. Brock would love it if the entire family spent our free time at SASS (Single Action Shooting Society) events. I vetoed that immediately. I don'...
Finding a hobby that the entire family enjoys can be difficult. And no, staring at the television does not count. Brock would love it if the entire family spent our free time at SASS (Single Action Shooting Society) events. I vetoed that immediately. I don't think spending my Saturdays hanging ...
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2014 Wagner Christmas Letter
Writing a Christmas letter has become an annual tradition. I usually send them to friends and family with a card and picture. In honor of the courageous  #nomakeupselfie  movement, I chose this one. In all seriousness, hashtags make me want to stab somethin...
2014 Wagner Christmas Letter. Writing a Christmas letter has become an annual tradition. I usually send them to friends and family with a card and picture. In honor of the courageous #nomakeupselfie movement, I chose this one. In all seriousness, hashtags make me want to stab something.
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Johi Kokjohn-Wagner

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Oh, good lawd. It's Monday, for sure. Today takes the cake (I'm betting the cake is moldy.)
The morning started off with the easy pace of a weekend. The only foreboding was the chaotic winter wind, whipping its chill through the last of the brown leaves clinging to the dormant trees. It should have been my clue, yet I drank my coffee with the blissful unknowing of a newborn.
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Johi Kokjohn-Wagner

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Hair today, gone tomorrow. It's 'time' for a new 'personality'.
I looked in the mirror last night and wanted to cry. When Brock told me that I looked haggard, he was right. My eyes were wrinkled, my skin was pale and splotchy, my clothes were outdated and my hair was an odd combination of straw, frizzy, greasy and strin...
I looked in the mirror last night and wanted to cry. When Brock told me that I looked haggard, he was right. My eyes were wrinkled, my skin was pale and splotchy, my clothes were outdated and my hair was an odd combination of straw, frizzy, greasy and stringy. I had officially reached my limit.
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Clearing the Cobwebs and Killing Spiders
"Mom! There's a GIANT black spider in your bathroom!" My oldest son was standing in front of me, wrapped in a towel. Water still dripped from his head. He was distressed. "Mmmm. Okay." I responded with disinterest. I was not afraid of spiders. Mostly. They ...
"Mom! There's a GIANT black spider in your bathroom!" My oldest son was standing in front of me, wrapped in a towel. Water still dripped from his head. He was distressed. "Mmmm. Okay." I responded with disinterest. I was not afraid of spiders. Mostly. They didn't really bother me. All that much.
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Have her in circles
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Self-promotion is hard, yo
After much contemplation, it has become clear that I need a more "professional" page for marketing myself. As much as I would like to assume that all people want to read stories of PMS , pubic hair , vacation fails and my childhood as an indentured servant ...
After much contemplation, it has become clear that I need a more "professional" page for marketing myself. As much as I would like to assume that all people want to read stories of PMS, pubic hair, vacation fails and my childhood as an indentured servant, I think assuming that would be incorrect ...
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New post, old sarcasm
I always love a fresh start. I'm the dork who gets excited about a new notebook and a fresh pack of pens (Precise rolling ball fine point, to be exact). I love the challenge of a black canvas or an empty room. The opportunities are unlimited. It's a New Yea...
I always love a fresh start. I'm the dork who gets excited about a new notebook and a fresh pack of pens (Precise rolling ball fine point, to be exact). I love the challenge of a black canvas or an empty room. The opportunities are unlimited. It's a New Year, which is a great time for new ...
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A Belated Advent Guide
Christmas is a time for traditions and giving. It is a time for reflection and gratitude. It is a time for moms and dads to make magic for their children! It is a time for those little numbered calendars that count down the days until Santa arrives! Er.... ...
Christmas is a time for traditions and giving. It is a time for reflection and gratitude. It is a time for moms and dads to make magic for their children! It is a time for those little numbered calendars that count down the days until Santa arrives! Er.... I mean, until Baby Jesus was born.
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A Serious Case of the Mondays
The morning started off with the easy pace of a weekend. The only foreboding was the chaotic winter wind, whipping its chill through the last of the brown leaves clinging to the dormant trees. It should have been my clue, yet I drank my coffee with the blis...
The morning started off with the easy pace of a weekend. The only foreboding was the chaotic winter wind, whipping its chill through the last of the brown leaves clinging to the dormant trees. It should have been my clue, yet I drank my coffee with the blissful unknowing of a newborn.
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This is hilarious! 
Bootcamp? Cross Fit? Remember the '80s when working out was fun?
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This.
HOT tips from a couples therapist on how to keep the spark alive while you're in the trenches of motherhood.
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People
Have her in circles
190 people
Bruce Starr's profile photo
Erin Coyle's profile photo
Jordan Gage's profile photo
Lynne Robertson's profile photo
Naps Happen's profile photo
Prin. Rosebud's profile photo
Kim Bongiorno (ElfShaming)'s profile photo
Sarah Egloff's profile photo
Katherine Rump's profile photo
Work
Occupation
Freelance Writer, Illustrator and Photographer
Skills
Story Telling, Humor, Creative Writing
Places
Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Currently
Colorado
Story
Tagline
Corn Fed Girl
Introduction
I was raised on corn and pork in the great state of Iowa. I enjoy reading, cooking, eating, art, photography,  wine, the great outdoors, most animals, remembering the past incorrectly, licking glass and pecking at shiny things. In my spare time I mother two adorable boys and do laundry. I also share my home with a handsome husband, two naughty dogs, two adorable ponies, two Quarter Horses and a smelly cat.
Education
  • University of Northern Iowa
    1997
Basic Information
Gender
Female
Other names
Johnny Cockajulie is my personal favorite alternate name.
Any business with "Outfitters" in their title and a dog named Sailor as their greeter is okay by me!
Public - 6 months ago
reviewed 6 months ago
1 review
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