On respect versus merit.
I've recently seen a few typical Open Source Collisions happen and being involved in it partially as well. As I'm a fairly pragmatic person I tend to shrug it off and focus on the work at hand, but there are always a few people around that can't understand that respect and merit are orthogonal.
Any new person who starts out doing Open Source should be met with the utmost respect. They have absolutely no merit to begin with, and others should encourage them and show the beginner mistakes in their work. The new people should treat experienced people as you would treat any good teacher: without any significant more respect than anyone else(!). Poke them, ask them, prod them for answers and explanations, but certainly do not go easy on your mentors - they are there not to sit on a throne and rule, but to guide everyone to do better.
Any experienced person should treat new contributors with respect, but treat their code for what it's worth. No need to get salty if it's bad. Just say "It's terrible" and leave it at that.
But that's where things go wrong. If you, as an experienced developer, fail to explain why a submission is wrong or misinformed, you're not giving someone the education or knowledge that you have, and you're guilty of depriving them of a chance to learn.
Now what I've noticed is that there seem to be many capable, experienced OSS contributors who lavish in merit and destroy their own respect, by ignoring this advice. These aren't business critical projects, but nonetheless it matters to a lot of people, so things get heated pretty quickly.
I've now seen two out of control spirals of disrespect end in people leaving. For no good reason than that the involved senior people entirely confuse merit and respect, and think that they are interchangeable.
It starts with reviews ending up saltier and shorter, especially for reviews from newer contributors. It ends with someone giving up, and sadly it's usually the newer people that give up, even though the potential that they will contribute more and better code in the future is often far more likely than that the merit-soaker is coming back to do actual coding.
So, takeaways for those that recognize the situation? If you don't code anymore in a project, don't become the grumpy reviewer. Let others take over. Stay constructive and technical, and teach instead of criticize. Never attack a person, ever.
Yes, there are indeed plenty of public OSS figures out there that violate these guidelines, and it's inexcusable, really. And totally not needed, either. I've most certainly have been on the wrong side as well, for sure, in the past. I hope I've made up for it, though, and intend to improve where I can.