What to do when you come home and find a cockroach on your vaulted ceiling...
1. Make a plan to call your exterminator.
2. Get a pillow to throw and see if you can knock it down.
3. Get your son's Star Wars Nerf blaster to see if you can knock it out of the far corner it retreated to after the pillow barrage.
4. Consider defeat and leave the cockroach up there.
5. Realize you are a man and that no stinking cockroach is going to get the best of you.
6. Have your wife mix an essential oil cocktail that roaches hate in a spray bottle.
7. Try spraying the cockroach who is just out of reach and get oils in your eye.
8. Lash an extension pole to a broom using packing tape and stretch wrap.
9. Climb a ladder propped on the wall and use the extension to knock the varmint out of the corner.
10. Realize that roaches have wings and scurry to contain it when it flies away.
11. Thank God that it retreats behind a picture hanging on your wall within reach.
12. Remove all the pictures around it and then zero in for the kill.
13. Remove the last pictures and strike with cat-like reflexes.
14. Celebrate your victory against the mighty beast with a tequila shot.#ns