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James Olchak
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The robust, middle-aged man has tan, leathery skin and a boisterous laugh. No matter how many times he's knocked down, he soon gets back up.   

Antaean CR 4 (MST3K 408)

XP 1,200
CN monstrous humanoid (earth)
Init +1 Senses darkvision 60ft.; Perception +10

DEFENSE

AC 16 touch 11, flat-footed 15 (+1 Dex, +5 natural)
hp 57 (5d10+30)
Fort +10 Ref +5 Will +6
Defensive Abilities Regeneration 10 (separation from earth)

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft.
Melee 2 slams +12 (1d6+7) or unarmed strike (1d4+7)
Ranged Mwk Composite Longbow +7 (1d8+7 X3) 

STATISTICS

Str 24, Dex 13, Con 22, Int 10, Wis 15, Cha 12
Base Atk +5 CMB +12 (+14 grapple) CMD 23 (+25 grapple, +27 stability)
Feats Improved Grapple, Improved Unarmed Strike, Point Blank Shot
Skills Climb +20, Intimidate +9, Perception +10, Survival +10  
Languages Common, Terran
SQ boosted fortitude, gaian invigoration, gaian regeneration, stability

Boosted Fortitude (Ex) An Antaean has good Fortitude saves, unlike most monstrous humanoids.

Gaian Invigoration (Su) An Antaean's Strength and Constitution gain a +4 enhancement bonus, as long as he is in bodily contact with dry earth (not mud, or bog), as if he were wearing a belt of physical might +4 improving those scores. This bonus is lost whenever the antaean loses contact with the ground for more than a single round. A creature can lift an antaean from the ground by making a successful grapple check to pin.

Gaian Regeneration (Su) An Antaean has regeneration 10 as long as he remains in contact with dry earth. Each round an antaean lies prone upon dry earth, he heals ability damage as if he rested for eight hours.

Stability (Su) Like a dwarf, an Antaean gains a +4 stability bonus against effects that would move him from his square.

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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In today's "Good, I hope they both fall into a volcano and die" news:

#Terriblepeople   #Garbagepeople  
Within the halls of Fox News a virtual blood feud grows between Megyn Kelly and Bill O’Reilly, two of the network’s biggest stars. The tension between the pair has apparently swelled in recent months, largely due to O’Reilly’s petulant jealousy.
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This disgusting creature has a slimy, wormlike body; a circular, lamprey-like mouth; and stubby tentacles covered in suction cups.   

Leechfolk CR 4 (MST3K 406)

XP 1200
NE medium aberration (aquatic)
Init +4 Senses Darkvision 60 ft., tremorsense 100 ft., keen scent; Perception

DEFENSE

AC 16, 14 touch, 12 flat footed (+4 Dex, +2 natural)
hp 37 (5d8+15)
Fort +3 Ref +5 Will +4
Defensive Abilities 

OFFENSE

Speed 5 ft. swim 50 ft.
Melee 2 tentacles +8 (1d3+5 plus grab) and bite +8 (1d8+5 plus 1d6 bleed plus poison)
Special Attacks poison, bleed (1d6), blood drain (1d2 Constitution)

STATISTICS

Str 20, Dex 19, Con 15, Int 6, Wis 16, Cha 10
Base Atk +3 CMB +8 (+12 grapple) CMD 22 (can't be tripped)
Feats Ability Focus (poison), Stealthy, Toughness
Skills Escape Artist +6, Perception +10, Stealth +11, Swim +14 Racial Modifiers +4 Swim
Languages Aklo (cannot speak)
SQ susceptible to salt

Poison (Ex) Creatures bitten by a leechfolk are exposed to a powerful numbing agent in the leechfolk's saliva.

Bite —injury; save Fort DC 16; frequency 1/round for 2 rounds; effect 1d2 Str and 1d2 Dex; cure 1 save.

Susceptible to Salt (Ex) 

A handful of salt burns a leechfolk as if it were a flask of acid, causing 1d6 points of damage per use.

#PathfinderRPG   #MST3K   #Monsters  
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This humanoid figure is wrapped in tattered, mold-rotted bandages. In lieu of a heart, a glowing crystal rests in the center of its chest.   

Farstrider CR 6 (MST3K 405)

XP 2400
N medium monstrous humanoid
Init +5 Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +16

DEFENSE

AC 15, flat footed 14, touch 11 (+1 Dex, +4 natural)
hp 55 (9d10)
Fort +5 Ref +7 Will +10
Defensive Abilities slime defense Immune disease, poison SR17

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft.
Melee Slam +13 (1d8+6 plus green slime) or slime touch +13 (green slime)
Ranged Light beam +10 touch (blindness)
Special Attacks green slime
Spell-Like Abilities

Constantlight, pass without trace 
At willknock locate object, mage hand, open/close 
1/1000 yearsinterplanetary teleport

STATISTICS

Str 19 , Dex 12, Con 10, Int 17, Wis 19, Cha 18 
Base Atk +9 CMB +13 CMD 24
Feats Great Fortitude, Improved Natural attack, Improved Initiative, Iron Will, Power attack,  
Skills  Knowledge (arcana) +12, Knowledge (history) +12, Knowledge (planes) +12, Perception +16, Sense Motive +16, Stealth +13, Use Magic Device +11
Languages telepathy (100 ft.)
SQ crystal beacons, slime synergy 

Crystal Beacons (Su) 

Farstriders are a race of extremely long-lived interstellar travelers. When they are born, they produce a series of 1d6 crystal beacons from their larger "heart crystal." Each beacon acts as an organic schematic for navigating via teleportation to an impossibly distant location. Arranging these crystals in a specific configuration allows a farstrider to create an interplanetary teleport effect. The crystals require 1000 years to recharge for another such trip, and each time a location is departed, one beacon must be left behind. Worlds upon which a crystal beacon has been left can be reached by any farstrider, without expenditure of another beacon.

Green Slime (Ex) 

A farstrider's slam attack transfers a tiny patch of green slime to its target. This patch deals 1d3 Con damage a round for 1d3 rounds unless scraped or burned away. This patch otherwise acts as the effects of the spell touch of slime.

Light beam (Ex)

As a standard action, a farstrider can emit a beam of intense white light from its heart crystal at a single target within 100 ft. Creatures struck by the light must make a DC 18 Fortitude save or become blinded for 1d6 rounds. Creatures that save against the effect are instead dazzled for 1d6 rounds.

Slime Defense (Ex) 

Once per round, when a farstrider is stuck by a manufactured melee weapon, he may allow a patch of green slime to coat the weapon. This deals 2d6 points of damage per round to metal or wooden objects (bypassing metal's hardness, but not the hardness of wood).

Slime Synergy (Ex)

A farstrider has a symbiotic relationship with the colony of green slime that lives on its body, which acts as an external digestive system, transferring metabolic energy to its host, in exchange for mental impulses which the slime finds beneficial. In addition, a farstrider may cause green slime to become dormant, digest only certain materials (while ignoring others), or replicate aggressively. The green slime living on the farstrider's body is conditioned to die a short time after becoming separated from the farstrider, unless the farstrider desires otherwise. This prevents a farstrider from spawning patches of destructive slime everywhere it travels. If the green slime colony is somehow destroyed, the farstrider suffers 1d6 Con damage, and cannot use his slime defense or green slime abilities until the slime is replaced. A farstrider can cultivate a new patch from even a single spore, although it requires 1d4 days to do so.

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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This simply hewn darkwood statue depicts a middle-aged woman, wearing the cap, coif, scapular, and veil of a common religious order. Her expression is stern, but not wrathful. She carries a slender wooden staff, seemingly too slim to wield as a weapon.   

Blackwood Nun CR 3 (MST3K 403)

XP 800
LN medium construct
Init +3 Senses Darkvision 60 ft. Perception +6

DEFENSE

AC 15 (+3 Dex, +2 natural)
hp 36 (3d10+20)
Fort +1 Ref +4 Will +3
Defensive Abilities DR 5/slashing, SR 13;
Immune construct traits

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft.
Melee Pointer +7 (1d6+4 plus 1d6 nonlethal)
Special Attacks discipline

STATISTICS

Str 17, Dex 16, Con —, Int —, Wis 14, Cha 13
Base Atk +3 CMB +6 CMD 19
Skills Knowledge (religion) +13, Perception +6 Racial Modifiers +8 Knowledge (religion), +4 Perception
Languages Common 
SQ bolster channel

Rote Instruction (Su) 

A blackwood nun is built to dispassionately but firmly instruct children or the otherwise ignorant in religious matters. Although they lack an intelligence score, they gain ranks in Knowledge (religion) as if they had an INT score of 10. A blackwood nun adds their WIS modifier to Knowledge (religion) checks, instead of INT, and gain a +8 bonus on Knowledge (religion) checks.

Discipline (Su) A blackwood nun's pointer functions as a +1 merciful club. A blackwood nun's pointer is part of its body, and cannot be disarmed, or sundered. A blackwood nun can elect to deal a single point of nonlethal damage with its pointer, rather than rolling damage.

Bolster Channel (Su) When a blackwood nun is adjacent to divine spellcaster of her order, it amplifies his ability to channel energy, adding +2 to the DC to reduce the effect, and an additional 1d6 of energy channeled (this bonus does not stack for multiple blackwood nuns). A blackwood nun from a neutral or good order is healed by positive energy as if it were a living creature, and a blackwood nun of an evil order is healed by negative energy as if undead. 

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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A tattered, sun-bleached pressure suit clings to this humanoid's shriveled frame. From behind a cracked visor, a white-eyed corpse glares with malice.   

Void Martyr CR 3 (MST3K 401)

XP 800
NE medium undead
Init +2 Senses darkvision 60 ft. Perception +7

DEFENSE

AC 18 (+2 armor, +2 deflection, +2 Dex, +2 natural)
hp 22 (3d8+9)
Fort +3 Ref +2 Will +4
Defensive Abilities debris
Immune undead traits, cold resist fire 10

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft. Fly 30 ft. (perfect)
Melee Slam +5 (1d8+3 plus grab)
Ranged debris +5 ranged (1d4+3)
Special Attacks suffocation

STATISTICS

Str 17, Dex 15, Con –, Int 6, Wis 13, Cha 14
Base Atk +2 CMB +5 CMD 17
Feats Toughness, Point blank shot
Skills Fly +14, Perception +7 Racial Modifiers +8 Fly
Languages Common
SQ drift

Debris (Su) A void martyr is surrounded by a floating cloud of debris, remnants of its destroyed pressure suit, broken tools, and pieces of rubble gathered up in its gravitational wake. This debris field provides a deflection bonus to the void martyr's AC equal to its Charisma bonus. As long as it has a hand free, a void martyr can also hurl a piece of this debris at an enemy within 30 ft. as a swift action (with no range increment). 

Drift (Su) A void martyr's fly speed is supernatural, and cannot be dispelled. A void martyr typically uses its fly speed, even when traveling along the ground, allowing it to pass freely over hazards or difficult terrain. A void martyr not standing on the ground is treated as a creature one size smaller for the purposes of the effects of wind.

Suffocation (Su) A void martyr's grip draws the air from the lungs of those it grapples. A creature grappled by a void martyr must hold their breath or begin suffocating.

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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James Olchak

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http://www.bleedingcool.com/2016/02/02/dc-comics-rebirth-a-new-justice-society-of-america-ongoing-title-to-launch/

So, DC using infinite Earths as ghettos for all the non-white, non-hetero characters is falling apart? And now they're bringing back all the old, white, homogenous versions of the characters?

WHO COULD HAVE PREDICTED IT

Oh, that's right, I did.
 
What's wrong with DC comics revisiting alternate realities? Nothing, but the way they're doing it is problematic for me and here are the reasons why:

A few years ago, DC had some sort of editorial mandate to introduce new, more ethnically diverse, versions of various B-list and C-list characters. As far as I know, it didn't have a name, this mandate, but basically this is how it worked.

1) Take a forgotten, unloved, currently unused DC character, like Firestorm, Blue Beetle, the Atom, or Aqualad.

2) Create a new version of that character who is not a bland white guy like every other DC character. Celebrate diversity!

3) Give the new ethnically diverse version of the character his own title to carry, despite the fact that previous versions of the character have never been able to maintain a monthly book.

4) When the book is not an immediate success, cancel the book, marginalize/get rid of the minority version of the character (killing them off, if possible), and immediately bring back the boring white guy version of the character.

5) Claim that people don't want to read about blacks or latinos or asians, citing the failure of these books as evidence. Diversity is over now!

Now that DC has reintroduced the "Infinite Earths," I'm seeing a weird pattern emerge. Now, I may be jumping the gun, but it seems as though DC is crafting these alternate earths as separate-but-equal places where they can put all the scary liberal threatening concepts like Gay Green Lantern Alan Scott (Earth-2) or President Black Superman and Black Wonder Woman (Earth-23). Maybe it's too early to say that DC wants to celebrate human diversity in their stories, but only in a way that doesn't affect the WASPy purity of the "real" DC universe. It's worth pointing out, however, that Marvel has been doing that exact thing for years.

It may surprise many of you to know this, but "Nick Fury," the super-spy character played by Sam Jackson in The Avengers was conceived as a white guy. In fact, for the majority of his comic book existence, he was a white guy. In 2001, the character of Nick Fury (looking exactly like Sam Jackson) was introduced in Marvel comics "Ultimate" Universe which, much like Earth-2 or Earth-23, is a separate reality from the "real" Marvel Universe, where they can tell more radical stories without upsetting the purity of their regular continuity. In the world of Marvel comics, black protagonists are a scary, radical concept. Remember the racist bru-ha-ha a year or so ago about Marvel introducing a new black/latino Spider-Man named Miles Morales? That was the "Ultimate" Universe. In regular Marvel continuity, Spider-Man is the same white Protestant dude he's always been.

In 2012, creating a separate universe for your minority characters seems like a regressive move.

#comics #diversity #marvelcomics #dccomics
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Dammit, James, stop being right about these things... >_<
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This repulsive, chittering rodent is as large as wolf. Its slavering mouth is filled with jagged, oversized fangs, and behind it drags a fat, hairless tail.   

Killer Shrew, Giant CR 5 (MST3K 407)

XP 1600
N medium animal
Init +9 Senses low-light vision, scent; Perception +10

DEFENSE

AC 16, 15 touch, 11 flat footed (+5 Dex, +1 natural)
hp 33 (5d8+10)
Fort +5 Ref +9 Will +3
Immune poison, disease

OFFENSE

Speed 50ft. 
Melee Bite +9 (1d6+1 plus hemotoxic saliva) 
Special Attacks Hemotoxic saliva, bleed (1d6 Con)

STATISTICS

Str 13, Dex 21, Con 12, Int 2, Wis 14, Cha 9
Base Atk +3 CMB +4 CMD 
Feats Toughness, Weapon Finesse, Weapon Focus (bite)
Skills Perception +10 Racial Modifiers 
Languages 
SQ fast metabolism

Fast Metabolism (Ex) 

A giant killer shrew requires three times it's weight in food each day, or it begins to suffer the effects of starvation. As long as a giant killer shrew is well fed, its rate of natural healing is tripled.

Gnaw Through (Ex) 

A giant killer shrew can gnaw through obstacles that would prove effective against larger, stronger animals. A giant killer shrew ignores up to hardness 8 when attacking objects.

Hemotoxic Saliva (Ex)

A Giant Killer shrew's overdeveloped jaws, steel-hard fangs, and hemotoxic saliva combined make a potent weapon against living creatures. A creature damaged by the bite of a killer shrew must make a DC 17 Fort save, or suffer 1d6 Con bleed. This is considered Con damage, not drain, and can be stopped with a DC 15 Heal check. The save DC is Constitution based, and includes a +4 racial bonus.

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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With a little more work, it could have been a full-on wondrous vehicle.

"Bigby's Roaming Mantlet."
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I couldn't figure out why today's Google doodle was of Karl Marx.

Turns out it's actually Frederick Douglass.

That makes more sense.
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This massive, jet-black crustacean scuttles over the treetops, waving two cruelly hooked pincers in the air.   

Gharggan CR 9 (MST3K 404)

XP 6400
N gargantuan vermin
Init +0
Senses darkvision 60 ft.; Perception +0

DEFENSE

AC (+20 natural –4 size) 
hp 105 (10d8 +50)
Fort +17 Ref +3 Will +3
Defensive Abilities DR 20/– vs. ranged attacks 
Immune mind-affecting effects Resist acid 10, cold 10, fire 10

OFFENSE

Speed 40 ft. 
Melee 2 Claws +18 (2d8+15)
Space 30 ft.; Reach 30 ft.
Special Attacks rend (2 claws, 2d8+20), trample (2d8+20, DC 30 half)

STATISTICS

Str 40, Dex 11, Con 21, Int –, Wis 10, Cha 1
Base Atk +7 CMB 26 CMD 36
SQ clamber, rapid growth

Bulletproof (Ex) A gharggan's shell is rounded, rigid, and composed of low-friction elements. It possesses DR 20/– against ranged attacks (but not ranged touch attacks).

Clamber (Ex) A gharggan's upright stance and many legs enable it to ignore nonmagical difficult terrain, and move freely over obstacles of up to huge size at full speed.

Rapid Growth (Ex) A gharggan can subsist on incredibly small amounts of atmospheric nutrients, using its incredibly efficient respiro-digestive system to create biomass preternaturally quickly. A larval gharggan can grow from diminutive (1 hd) size to its full gargantuan (10hd) size in a single day. 

Focusing Disintegrator Ray, Handheld

Price 72,000 gp; Type one-handed ranged; Proficiency exotic (firearms); Dmg (M) special (see text); Dmg (s) special; Critical —; Range 50 ft.; Capacity 50; Usage 1 charge; Special touch; Weight 1/2 lb.

DESCRIPTION

A focusing disintegrator projects an isolated beam that separates molecules of living material in chain reaction, leaving only bones behind. A creature struck by the beam emitted by the compact pistol must make a DC 19 Fortitude save, or take 24d6 points of damage. Creatures that successfully resist the guns effect take 5d6 damage. Creatures reduced to 0hp by the focusing disintegrator have their flesh instantaneously vaporized, leaving only their bones and non-organic belongings behind. A focusing disintegrator has no effect on non-organic materials.

CONSTRUCTION

Craft DC 35; Cost 36,000 gp; Craft Technological Arms and Armor, military lab

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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This enormous, slow-moving reptile has a thickly muscled body and distinctive pebbled hide. From its mouth hangs threads of virulent, venomous saliva.   

Heloderm, Giant CR 8 (MST3K 402)

XP 3200
N huge animal
Init –1 Senses low-light vision, scent; Perception +13

DEFENSE

AC 23 (–1 Dex, –2 Size, +16 natural) 
hp 117 (18d8+36)
Fort +15 Ref +10 Will +9

OFFENSE

Speed 30 ft. burrow 30 ft. 
Melee Bite +20 (3d6+9 19-20/X2 plus disease plus grab)
Space 15 ft.; Reach 10 ft.
Special Attacks disease, poison, swallow whole (2d6 acid, 2d6 bludgeoning, AC 18, 11 hp)

STATISTICS

Str 29, Dex 8, Con 15, Int 1, Wis 13, Cha 4
Base Atk +13 CMB 21 CMD 30
Feats Awesome Blow, Diehard, Endurance, Great Fortitude, Improved Bull Rush, Improved Natural Attack (bite), Improved Critical (bite), Iron Will, Power Attack 
Skills Perception +13, Stealth +5 (+13 scrubland) Racial Modifiers +8 Stealth in scrubland
SQ sluggish venom

Disease (Ex)

Rotwound (Ex) Bite—injury; save Fort DC 21, onset 1d3 hours, frequency 1 day, effect 1d6 Con damage, cure 2 consecutive saves; Special Creatures suffering con damage from rotwound give off a strong odor of rotting flesh, making them more easily tracked by creatures with scent. 

Poison (Ex) 

Heloderm Venom (Ex) Grapple—injury; save Fort DC 21, frequency 1/round for 6 rounds, effect 1d4 Dex, cure 1 save.

Sluggish Venom (Ex) 

A giant heloderm's poison glands are weak, and require a chewing action to deliver venom to a target. Only creatures successfully grappled by a giant heloderm are exposed to its poison.

#PathfinderRPG #MST3K #Monsters
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James Olchak

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I hope Christian Bale's tantrum a couple years ago is somehow related to this.

"Well, we already have this millionaire Welsh dickhead screaming at us like a colicky toddler, we should at least make more money."

Go get em' guys.
Blockbuster films shooting in Britain, including the new Star Wars movie, could be hit by delays after lighting technicians threatened to revolt over pay. The technicians are furious after failing to receive a pay rise for four years and have threatened to quit, which would delay nine major productions currently shooting in the UK. After talks broke down between the lighting technicians’ union representatives at Bectu and the employers’ body Pact...
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