Watching the Live Action Jem and the Holograms and Rambling.
Along ago, back in 2015 or 2014, I saw the trailer for the live-action Jem and the Holograms movie and I got a bit excited for the movie. Though, then after it came out, it got some pretty terrible reviews, so I ended up just never giving it a shot.

Though this evening, after watching two Oscar-nominated movies, I thought "what the hell". However, since this is potentially terrible, I think you know what I have to do - write down my rambling stream of consciousness throughout the movie.

Here we go...

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Wait, this is a 2-hour movie? What am I getting myself into.

Starting out logo music is kinda nice. Huh.

Clip-intro - with some pretty decent stuff. This is kinda nice. I may or may not be getting goosebumps.

What?!?!? I kinda really this so far. Though to be fair, we're only 3 minutes in.

Yeee! It's the girls-like-girl actress.

And the girls-like-girl singer?!?!?

Tragic backstory that makes me feel feelings and say awww. :'-(

Okay, that was one great intro to the movie. How is this movie going to let me down?

No, her hair is not a mess - but you still improved it.

Why does all of this feel so familiar? Did I once get blackout drunk and watch this before? Please tell me I didn't do a rambling post of this already?

Aww. The yelling and fighting stopped when the mother (?) asked for them to start singing.

That mother is awesome. These girls are awesome. This is all kinda awesome. :-)

Not "mother" - "aunt". Got it.

"No results found for "Jem and the Holograms" Reschat." - Google. Huh, if I've seen this before Google doesn't know.

They are creating a music video - but the synthesized sound is kinda... terrible. The visuals are cool and fun though.

Ah, now I see why they did that. They want some contrast to when the main character starts singing - alone in her room.

I'm still confused about what part of this movie is going to be terrible. Acting? Great. Scenography? Great? Interesting? Yes. Moving? Yes. Entertaining? Yes. - So what is going to go wrong? Sorry - I'm too focused on the whole "people tell me this is a terrible movie" part.

Aww. She hides her insecurities with some makeup to be became brave enough to share her talent with the internet.

Awww. She is smiling when hearing her sister singing. :-)

Awwww. They all are. :-D

Girls supporting girls. I'm all here for that.

Kimberly, I know you did that with the best of intentions, but maybe not the best thing to do with asking your sister first. Still, kudos for believing in and supporting your sister.

There is so much joy. I love it!

"You're way more than water-skiing squirrel." - That's an interesting compliment.

Where have I seen this actress who plays Aunt? She reminds me of some kind of classic movie.

The Aunt is really sweet and supporting. I like her.

Jem really not bending concerning bringing her sisters with her. I love it.

Oh, I really hope this isn't going in the classic Josie and the Pussycats direction.

Okay, who is this? Slow walk up intro with camera aimed at her feet while rock music is playing? This gotta be someone real powerful.

Ooh, and she kicked the skateboard!!! Real bad-ass introduction.

Juliette!!! Yes. She's a real natural born killer - and in this movie she is apparently killing it in the music industry.

Wait, they're leaving with that Lady the second they meet her? Is this how it works when opportunity knocks?

Hey Lady - don't disrespect Aunt.

This feels a lot like binging a series. Like one of those with 10-20 minute episodes. Huh - maybe more people would have liked this if it was released as a mini-series.

Dude, you don't have the right to wish anyone luck with their style, the way you look. Pst! PrettyBoy™.

Wait, Lady is giving style advice to the girls?

Lady is rude. How is acting this way okay?

NO! Those earrings were made by her sister? Don't insult them and put them away like that!

This feels A LOT like Josie and the Pussycats movie, with a slightly more realistic twist to it.

Makeover montage! This is fun.

Hayley's character kinda makes me thing of how I think Hayley is IRL. Lighthearted and fun in a sincere way.

Oh. Jem completely set up PrettyBoy™ for that burn.

Wait, wait, wait. It seems like things are getting weird.

And just as I wrote that, the narrator said "this is where it gets weird".

Wait, is this a sci-fi movie?

Oh, I think I know where this is going in an extremely specific way. Jem's father created an AI robot based of himself for his daughter to find after his death. Did I watch this movie before?
[Post movie note: Nope.]

So far, yes, that is what is happening.

Sigh, the sister's technobabble is terrible!

I know they present this as happy and fun, but I kinda think it is sad (in a heartfelt, emotional way). The father created a final adventure for his daughter for her to experience after he passed away. :'-)

That is one high-tech robot.

I do like that all of the sisters are caught up in this adventure and having a good time - but I still can't help but think of the thoughts of Jem's father while preparing this adventure for this daughter while dying. This is more moving that "romantic" movie where that guy left a GB adventure of letters for his girlfriend to find after his death. Yes, _Jem and the Holograms" is nailing its sidestory of a past loved one's messages from beyond the grave better than that one specific movie where it was its main plot-line.

Hayley being the first to jump off the pier into the oceans at night - and even yelling with joy while doing so. No surprise there. :-)

Aw. The sisters are singing on the beach, a cappella. I love this.

Wait, the PrettyBoy™ jumps in? Heh. This is cheesy as fuck - but I kinda really love the joy of this scene.

Damn, Lady sounds like she kinda knows how to drive internet hype.

The sisters being being super happy on Jem's behalf is what I'm here for.

YAY! "Love Myself" is playing as Jem and the Holograms make their first public appearance.

These sisters are still ecstatic for and supporting each other. This is amazing.

The editing is still that of web-series with 10-minute episodes and not that of a 2-hour movie.

Their first performance together and I'm kinda feeling it. :-)

I feel like they had so much fun making this movie.

What's happening? This might be great, might be terrible.

Goosebumps. Yep, this is great.

If this happened in real life, it would be absolutely legendary. (Also pretty damn hard to pull off - but I'll suspend disbelief for a moment here.)

These VHS flashbacks are really pulling at my heartstrings.

They got The Rock in this? :-D

Come on, movie. You're really telling me that Jem (with her 3 awesome sisters) "got no-one to talk to" and has to turn to PrettyBoy™ for a heart-to-heart? Pst!

Wait, isn't Jem supposed to be like 16, while PrettyBoy™ looks like he's in his early 30's? Why is he hitting on her?

Wait, were I supposed to care for PrettyBoy™ and think that it is tragic for him to move to a different project in his mother's company?

Oh. No. Does this mean what I think it seems? Is Aunt losing the girls and will they be forced apart?

Lady not understanding the value in the sisters together is the part about her that confuses me the most. This is some cynical, out-of-touch, old-school thinking.

I think this exact scene was in Josie and the Pussycats too. Though this time around they really put the emotional blackmail on thic.

Argh. She signed (just like Josie). :-(

This first scene of the sisters honestly being disappointed, upset, and angry with one another is heartbreaking. This is no fun. :'-(

Oh, this concert is going to feel hollow without the sisters.

I think I recognize that voice. Is that Jem singing or someone else?

Still, beautifully shot music video. Definitely some Sia inspirations.

Aww. The sisters just wanted to do this thing together and Lady manipulated Jem into destroying that.

No, this is not "a band¹ breaking up". This is a band² OF SISTERS breaking up. Not okay. :'-(

Wait, did they cut out an important scene or am I missing something big here?

Quoting a Beyonce song in order to tell your sisters you love them. Perfection!

Hayley instantly apologizing for bringing along a boy. :-P

A callback to the solution to the sisters not getting along. This kinda great. :'-)

Sorry, I zoned out for a minute there; when did this suddenly go turn into a heist movie?

Chromecast for the rescue?

Valey Brad's music is awful. Fully expected.

Did Kimberly just hack a giant music production company?

Nope, that was Hayley. I kinda like that I could think that two of the sisters were able of doing this.

Damn! Jem's father really was next-gen with the tech he created.

This being the climax of the movie is absolutely unexpected and completely heart-wrenching. This is way better than I had ever hoped for.

Aww! The father considers his AI robot a she. Of course he does. With his immense love for his daughter, of course his work would reflect that. :'-)

Father working in his lab, hugging his daughter and him saying "I'm working on my greatest creation" - referring to his daughter and not his work. :'-)

Jem together with her sisters again is still the best thing.

Why am I crying? Wasn't this supposed to be a shit movie? How the fuck can a shit movie introduce a short Instagram montage that brings me to tears? I can't. This is a great movie.

Okay, that plot-line and plot twist were completely unnecessary. But still, it's good to see Lady get what she deserves.

You know those movies that feels like they're ending? But then they go on and then feel like they're ending? And then goes on and just keep doing this? Well, this.

I suddenly got the point of the movie - when it was explicitly said out loud. We are all Jem. :-P

I really want to rewatch all Hayley music videos now - especially Girls Like Girls.

Ooh, another personal video montage - and it is amazing.

I kinda love this. :-)

Side note: This location looks exactly like that one mall map from L4D. Not important - it caught my eye.

Sigh. Of course it had to end with Jem making out with PrettyBoy™. Sigh.

And the credits rolls - with a pretty decent song.

Wait, how the fuck was this supposed be a terrible movie? I kinda really liked it.

Post-credit scene? Oh, what is this???

Lady enters abandoned place.

Wait, who are these ladies?

Previous pop girl group hanging out in abandoned building in full makeup?

Roxy?

I like these girls.

Who said "wait" from the back there?

KESHA?!?!?!?!?

Is this a setup for a sequel? I'm definitely up for that. Wait, that didn't happen... Oh... :-(

Are these girls cannibals or something? They definitely acted in that sorta way.

Okay, now the movie is completely over, right? And ending with some quiet sad credit music, eh?

Post movie note:
My rating of this movie is the exact same as the average rating of <18 year old girls - while everyone else seem to have hated (HATED!) it - with them on average giving it 3.6/10, which is kinda unheard of for big budget movies like this; same rating as The Room (2003) btw.
This movie had A LOT of things going for it - and it executed a lot of things really well. I think the problem for most people were the format - even if they didn't realize so. This 2-hour movie should have been 14-20 episodes of around 10 minutes. Then it would have been absolutely perfect in regard to how the many stories were told and how the movie was edited. Still, watching the movie as if binging a web series still worked and I kinda really liked it. This was a good movie! :-)

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(List of all my reviews and ramblings at reviews.reschat.com)
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