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Erika Rice Scherpelz
Works at Google
Attended University of Washington
Lives in Kirkland, WA
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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It's 70F and sunny, and I'm feeling a bit on the overly warm side.

#pacificnorthwestnative 
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Had lunch outside today. What a lovely day!
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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Following up on the post about assuming good faith that I shared, I don't think that assuming good faith means that you always have to engage or always let others engage.

Rather, it means that when you choose to engage, assume good faith. If you can't assume good faith, don't engage. It's really tempting to engage because not engaging feels like you're letting the other person win, and as humans we understandably hate that. But when you engage without the assumption of good faith, you end up losing: losing time, losing happiness, losing faith in humanity.

So instead, when you can't assume his faith, walk away.

Or, when it's your own forum, delete away; it's not violating anyone's rights to protect the tone of a forum you own. But be very self critical of your use of this tool and ask yourself every time you use it if you could have found a way to assume good faith.
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It's a good approach. I've had "write moderation policy" on my todo list for -- well, for longer than I'm able to remember. =)
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"The last time the state shut down the I-90 bridge, it created a traffic nightmare across Seattle. Yet, there's another closure on the books for this weekend."

What do the authors of this paragraph think, that they close down I-90 just for fun? 
The last time the state shut down the I-90 bridge, it created a traffic nightmare across Seattle. Yet, there's another closure on the books for this weekend.
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My mom's visiting this weekend. :O
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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Truth
Even if you don't want one, you should really watch the monocle video :). Discuss this comic in the forum. March 16, 2015. Monocles are here! Discuss this comic in the forum. March 16, 2015. MONOCLES IMMINENT. Discuss this comic in the forum. March 16, 2015. It's COMING ...
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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More from The Righteous Mind by Jonathan Haidt, pg 130-131:

We've advanced a lot since the 1970s in our understanding of the brain, and now we know that traits can be innate without being either hardwired or universal. As neuroscientist Gary Marcus explains, "Nature bestows upon the newborn a considerably complex brain, but one that is best seen as prewired — flexible and subject to change — rather than hardwired, fixed and immutable."

To replace wiring diagrams, Marcus suggests a better analogy: The brain is like a book, the first draft of which is written by the genes during fetal development. No chapters are complete at birth, and some are just rough outlines waiting to be filled in during childhood. But not a single chapter — be it on sexuality, language, food preferences, or morality — consists of blank pages on which a society can inscribe any conceivable set of words.
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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Some people have to work harder than others, Jen among them, but whoever you are, ultimately work is going to get you further than any number of lifehacks or tips (not that can't be useful, but they're tools, and tools don't use themselves). At the same time, as Jen puts it:

Also don’t mistake any of this as a defense for any sort of existing system that doesn’t make professional and personal pathways easier for all people. We should all be working towards better systems to support all people to make it easier for them to succeed without working themselves to the bone to improve their lives and families’ opportunities. But, if you’re like me, you have to do something in the present moment to help yourself. And so here we are.
On how to do everything. 13 March 2015. Should you ever want or need it, the shortcut to immediately irritating me is to ask me in a wondering tone of voice how I do everything that I do. I understand the impulse. I do a lot. I raise a kid without a partner or financial support.
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Usually, I post a remembrance of my mom on the anniversary of her death. This year I didn't because I was busy putting the lessons she taught me into practice.

This week I had the worst work week of my life; a week that ranks just below personal tragedies in the overall worst weeks of my life. During this time, I have been thanked for integrity, strength, and caring.

In so far as I have shown those attributes, a huge portion of the credit goes to my wonderful mother. She was always a person who demonstrated strength, caring, and integrity in her life. She taught me by example to be there for others and do what was right even when it was hard. 

Thank you mommy, for giving me so so much in too short a time.
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I'm sorry you've had an awful week. If there's anyway I can help let me know.
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Have her in circles
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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Or as I think of it, the principle of charity is primarily valuable because of the type of system it causes, not because it's always a valid assumption.
 
Bad-Faith Good-Faith

I presume good faith almost unconditionally. And I've seen this criticized on the basis that it's not true, which ...

... well, of course it isn't true. Why would anyone expect it to be? Presumptions aren't truths about the world. In many cases, they are plainly untrue. Most people tried for crimes are, in fact, guilty of those crimes. Some people who make accusations are wrong. Most people in high-conflict interactions will eventually resort to bad faith. 

Rather, a presumption is an interpretive stance taken to achieve a particular result. The presumption of innocence creates a bias against false positives. The contradictory presumption in favor of victim narratives prevents us from inadvertently punishing someone for reporting someone else's misdeeds. The presumption of good faith creates a bias in favor of de-escalating, rather than escalating, interpersonal conflicts.

Which is why I'm unwilling to deploy an accusation of bad faith unless it's clear that the person that I'm talking to is using bad faith as an explicit strategy, rather than just a defensive reaction to a high-conflict situation: once I've made that conclusion, the only safe response is to wall off their criticisms of my position, and not take them seriously. And that makes me vulnerable to going the same way.

Which would be pretty much the most disastrous thing I can think of.
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Interesting. 
The most expensive and cheapest cities, and everything in between.
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I'm with Gabe, I can't imagine buying a home AND supporting a wife and child in Seattle proper on that salary. 
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I've generally considered it to be obvious that if I have a sore throat, I should stay home. Then I took a too large sip of my still hot tea.

At least my voice is working normally. 
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I need some paddles.
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Erika Rice Scherpelz

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Are you looking for solutions, or comfort?

There may not be a more important question to ask someone who's not feeling his or her best. Offering solutions, my natural response, can come across as overbearing or manipulative when comfort is wanted. Conversely, comfort can seem distant or shallow to someone looking for solutions. 
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Option C: sleep :-) 
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Have her in circles
1,501 people
Elkhayer TECK's profile photo
Anny Jonnes's profile photo
Chris Baron's profile photo
Major Singh Bhatti's profile photo
Francisco Alcorta's profile photo
Yazid Djari's profile photo
John Skeats's profile photo
Rainer Johansson's profile photo
Greg Smith's profile photo
Communities
22 communities
Education
  • University of Washington
  • Harvey Mudd College
  • Marysville-Pilchuck High School
  • Marysville Junior High School
  • Marysville Middle School
  • Marshall Elementary
  • Fairmont Elementary
  • Joy of Learning Montessori Preschool
Basic Information
Gender
Female
Relationship
Married
Other names
Erika Rice
Story
Tagline
Nerd, crafter, software engineer.
Work
Occupation
Software Engineer
Employment
  • Google
    Software Engineer, present
  • University of Washington
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Map of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has livedMap of the places this user has lived
Currently
Kirkland, WA
Previously
Marysville, WA - Claremont,CA - Seattle, WA
Great venue for a baby shower! The cupcakes are a bit sweeter than I like, but still very tasty.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
I've been visiting Dr. Kim for years. His office takes great care in finding high quality hygienists who make you feel that the cleaning experience is as pleasant as having your teeth cleaned can be. Dr. Kim lets you know about cosmetic dental options, but he doesn't push them, and he's very clear about when he's making recommendations for medical reasons vs suggestions for aesthetic reasons.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
My favorite hot chocolate in Seattle, plus a great selection of chocolates and truffles.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
The molten chocolate cakes are delicious, but so are the other desserts.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
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I've been seeing Cassie at Vain for years, and I've always been happy with the service. The vibe of the salon is contemporary without being pretentious.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
I've been going to Earthly Rituals for years, and I love the personalized experience Patti gives me. Not only do I get her full attention, but she knows my skin well enough to make sure my facial is always customized to what I need that day.
Public - 9 months ago
reviewed 9 months ago
Very nice, great location for my needs.
Public - a year ago
reviewed a year ago