Be My Valentine
“We are capable of loving more than one person at a time,” says Biological anthropologist, Helen Fisher, in a TED talk that raises some questions and answers just as many: https://goo.gl/SGIhN5
. Love is something even the least introspective of us have grappled with at some point or another: https://goo.gl/F2vl08
. The reason is that we can feel the drive that comes from it while acknowledging the possibility that it may lead us down a path where we could experience a sense of loss and pain, things we are hardwired by nature to avoid.
The sense of helplessness we feel when it comes to love has frequently become the key through which we uncover deeper perspectives: http://goo.gl/2xsBQB
. Beyond the fact that countless songs, books, plays and ballads have been written about it, it has also led to a few Jimmy Kimmel moments: http://goo.gl/9mZfvF
In 2014 “love” was the most common search on Google: https://goo.gl/9UZTEv
leading The Guardian
to ask five experts to explore different aspects of it: http://goo.gl/sHQnQB
“Love has nothing to do with what you are expecting to get — only with what you are expecting to give — which is everything.” Says Maria Popova in her popular BRainpickings
about it. The ancient Greeks who have given us many definitions and more than just a few of the words we use in English to describe things that are deep, when it come to love appeared to have given up, thrown their hands up in the air and chickened out, giving us not one, not two, not three but seven
different types of love: http://goo.gl/nZReyn
which means that either they could see things deeper and clearer than us (which is possible) or that they took an analyst’s classification tendency a little too far, over-compartmentalizing and giving us perhaps a way out of the many impasses such a strong, complex emotion often places us in.
The five best love songs of all time: https://goo.gl/kvqx7l
shows that when it comes to love, we look, in our tunes, for a blend of happiness and sadness, bliss and violence.
When it comes to books most lists unequivocally place Jane Austen’s Pride and Prejudice
) at the very top.
Trying to understand how (and why) we fall in love, inevitably, leads down a journey of exploration of the brain inside our heads: http://goo.gl/WNDCfp
. Love, it would appear, despite what poets may have said, resides mostly in the brain: https://goo.gl/i3IDmj
where it apparently also mutates: http://goo.gl/MHPDDv
Love, suggest, some will happen to everyone at some point regardless: https://goo.gl/Ts6HKx
though that does not mean it will be reciprocated. While culture often dictates how love can be expressed: http://goo.gl/t9cGUd
and how it can even be perceived: http://goo.gl/ihOUbe
when it comes to how our brains react, it would appear, we are all the same: http://goo.gl/fOoT
A sameness that does not appear to change much when we compare traditional ways of finding love: http://goo.gl/rDhFnX
with the modern age love for apps that kinda help us out in the task (and sorry, I couldn’t resist the pun): https://goo.gl/fwa7np
There is a small suggestion that today we are having a harder time finding love (http://goo.gl/8bQYhh
) than, say, Jane Austen’s days (http://goo.gl/PgNZui
) – or maybe not (http://goo.gl/DIvtCN
) which is why her work has been so enduring: https://goo.gl/mylmIb
The real question of course, for us, has to be: “Can we find love online?” – No! says Marie Claire
to its readers: http://goo.gl/y0nKl2
- you shouldn’t even try. Yes! Advise the founders of OKCupid (perhaps predictably) but you have to be real - https://goo.gl/7G7Doq
As a person who’s seen hundreds of relationships develop and flourish from an online connection, and a sizable percentage end up in marriage I know that we are at our most likeliest to find love when we are ourselves in a social media environment that doesn’t have us looking, necessarily, for love.
Social media has inevitably had its effect here (http://goo.gl/YkbFUv
) just like it has had its effect on everything else that has to do with human connection and human emotions.
What is however perhaps the most uplifting of all about all this is that irrespective of who we are, what we believe in, how we were raised or what we want to do, love functions inside us the same way. We are all prone to it and capable of being just as ‘crazy’ or ‘stupid’ from it as when 10th century Arab philosopher and poet Omar Khayyam (https://goo.gl/1j9lYZ
) said: It’s too bad if a heart lacks fire,and is deprived of the lightof a heart ablaze.The day on which you arewithout passionate loveis the most wasted day of your life.
We love, perhaps, because through it we feel totally alive.
So, today of all days, cookies, chocolate donuts, croissants and chocolate cake are in order but they must be heart shaped and don’t forget, without coffee we are only halfway there. Have an awesome Sunday, wherever you are.