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Daniel Swensen
9,375 followers -
All the ways you were don't matter anymore
All the ways you were don't matter anymore

9,375 followers
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Just a friendly reminder: I write books! Well, I've written one book. It's a fantasy novel. If you want to purchase it in .mobi or .epub, you can do so directly from the publisher's store, as well as from Amazon and B&N. It's also available in paperback from Amazon. (Links below.)

Why should you buy it? Well, here's what some people said about it. 

"Orison is one of the best leaps of faith I've taken on a fantasy book. It has dragon gods and goddesses, a thieves' guild, sorcerers, and a mysterious orb all colliding with each other in spectacular fashion." - Amazon reviewer

"Neither overlong (250 pages) nor grimdark, this novel moves at a breakneck pace, featuring taut descriptions of battle and kinetic chase scenes. Recommended!" - Rafael Chandler

"I commend the author for keeping this book accessible to a wide audience. As a parent, I appreciate when I can read a book which was written for adults then hand it to my middle-school daughter. Orison is such a book. Not pedantic or "dumbed down" at all, it still avoids the language or sex that would make it inaccessible to a young or religious audience. This is a novel you can give to any fantasy lovers who have worked their way up to that reading level." - Marissa Ames

"There are shades of The Black Company and Steven Erikson's Malazan books running through this, in terms of feel, though I found the story to be wholly original." - R.S. Kimsey

" I could hardly put it down until I finished (if I had a choice, I never would have put it down)." - Brooke Johnson

[http://ninemusepress.com/books/orison/]
[http://www.amazon.com/Orison-Daniel-Swensen-ebook/dp/B00IOQF4AI]
[http://www.barnesandnoble.com/w/orison-daniel-swensen/1118759142?ean=2940149591718]

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Hey! Look at these deals. I hear they include content/developmental editing, grammar and full line editing, plus only a $50 charge for a second draft read. I hear I even do affordable payment plans too. And just a 15% down payment. Take advantage!

85,000 to 100,000 (if higher price will be adjusted) words: $800
70,000 to 84,000 words: $700
55,000 to 69,000 words: $600
40,000 to 54,000 words: $500
25,000 to 39,000 words: $400
Less than 25,000 words: $250 (or less, depending on individual situations/lengths)

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It looks so gooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooood

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D_6J9BqgonU

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Birthday present. Super excited!
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Radish hates the Lego Batman movie.
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Spied a couple of little furry explorers before driving my wife to work this morning. 
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KONG: SKULL ISLAND was a classic scenario of me renting a movie and getting exactly what I expected (and wanted) from it:

- Metric tons of non-stop giant creature rasslin'
- A largely rudimentary storyline where characters are popped off like teenagers at Crystal Lake, except the teenagers are hardened Vietnam soldiers and Crystal Lake is populated with ten-story spiders*
- Nothing but the most paper-thin characterization and expository dialogue so that little gets in the way of the creature rasslin'
- Ludicrous "romance" between giant ape and female lead drastically minimized (in favor of giant ape throwing most of the island at other creatures)
- John C. Reilly with a katana

8/10, enjoyed the creature rasslin' very much. Only major complaint: soundtrack was of the Suicide Squad school of "play ten seconds of iconic period track, wait five seconds, play ten seconds of another iconic track, repeat." Hollywood pls stop.

* No really, there is a ten-story spider in this movie and IT IS NOT OKAY WITH ME. 
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The face of pure relaxation.
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Minor spoilers for *Backcountry,* a movie that's supposedly about a couple being menaced by a bear out in the woods, but is actually about a woman being menaced by the arrogant idiocy of her dumbass boyfriend who takes her out to the woods and doesn't bring a map and leaves the phone in the car because he Knows What He's Doing and also Doesn't Want Girlfriend on Phone the Entire Time. Began movie thinking boyfriend would probably get eaten by a bear, now upgraded to hoping she crushes his ankle with a rock and leaves him to be bear-snacks.

https://www.netflix.com/title/80018336

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