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Chet Haase
Works at Google
Attended Carleton College
17,704 followers|13,699,442 views
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Chet Haase

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In God I trust
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Hey Android devs: submit something awesome to the Devoxx Call for Papers.
Help make it an excellent mobile developer conference.

http://cfp.devoxx.us 
Methodology & Architecture, Software development methodologies, architectures, encryption & best practices to develop secure software, etc. Java Language, Java Language, Java SE, JDK, Performance Tuning, Modularity, etc. Cloud, Containers & Infrastructure, Docker, Kubernetes, Vagrant, Cloud, ...
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Today's complete shopping list.

Unrelated: Why does America have an obesity problem?
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and on that note, let's leave it there.
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Speechless! Tonight! Public Works! San Francisco! Hilarity and multiple exclamation points!

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/speechless-september-15th-tickets-27132231234
Since 2013, Speechless has been selling out shows at comedy clubs and conferences all over the country and the world. Armed only with a laser pointer and a deck of random slides, presenters ranging from stand up comedians to software engineers and Tony Award winners to TED presenters have put their talents to the test in the ultimate improvisational gauntlet--giving a presentation that they've never seen before. Fusing technology with comedy, Spe...
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Conservative Values are what you get when you round down.
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Integers for life, yo
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I gave a talk recently about jobs, careers, comedy, and life. In the Q&A, someone asked:
"How do you deal with stress?"
I answered: Strong coffee, sleep loss, and constant worrying.
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Good you love it!
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There are no bugs.
There are only placeholders for future improvements.
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lol, nice one.
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My latest, terribly important treatise on engineering.

Many engineers feel that their productivity is killed by meetings, and that fewer meetings means more code and therefore greater productivity. Other engineers (typically managers who used to write code and like to pretend that they’re still engineers) feel that meetings are productive because they synergize and facilitate, enabling communication in an empowering means of forward-thinking thoughtfulness (or something like that).

https://medium.com/pointer-io/the-engineers-guide-to-desks-6b4d9862ba54#.551d54w7p
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+Robert Cooper I'm highly sensitive to the sugar- and caffeine-content on said desk!
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Starting tonight, Saturday the 17th: 24 hours of Speechless. Should be weird.

There are 24 separate shows, all comedy, all variations on the Speechless theme/format (I think).
I'm in the 4pm and 7pm shows on Sunday, but there are a lot of others that are worth checking out.

Tickets get you into the entire marathon (which you are allowed to leave and come back to if you just want to take in a show or tow, or for some reason you don't feel like absorbing 24 hours of improv, or you need, like, sleep or something).

https://www.eventbrite.com/e/speechless-marathon-tickets-27249705603
The SF Improv Festival Presents: Speechless Marathon. 24 Hours. 144 Presentations. No Sleep. Speechless, the hit comedy show that pokes fun at PowerPoint, is pulling an all nighter as the grand finale of the San Francisco Improv Festival. The 24 hour event will be filled with improvised talks from Speechless' favorite past presenters from the worlds of comedy and corporate America as well as special guests and audience volunteers. Not only wil...
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+Andrew Jones-McGuire Argh. I totally broke the build on that syntax error.
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My wife said, "Do you an extra lanyard?"

Uh, yeah. After 6.5 years of conference talks, I think I can find one lying around somewhere.
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I wonder if @boredelonmusk thought of an ebay for celebrity lanyards yet.
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Did you ever wonder where all the old, bad pop music went?
It's at your dentist's office. You can visit it there, every 6 months.
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+Christian Robertson  I've only ever been to Jelly Donut in town (or Safeway in a pinch). They're pretty awesome on a Sunday morning. Can't compare to Donut King.
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Story
Tagline
Graphics geek, comedy nerd
Introduction
I'm a software geek, working at Google, making Android graphics and animation more excellent. In previous lives I've worked at Sun on the JDK, at Adobe on Flex, and various other places in Silicon Valley, always working on graphics software.

In my copious spare time, I write. I write humor on my blog Enough About You... along with my G+ stream at google.com/+ChetHaase and on Twitter via @chethaase. I also occasionally post technical articles on CodeDependent. I co-wrote the book Filthy Rich Clients with Romain Guy, wrote another programming book Flex 4 Fun about Flex graphics and animation, and wrote humor books Round and HolyWhen I am King.... and the long-anticipated sequel, When I am King... II. Like women and childbirth, I eventually forget the pain of the process of writing a book, and will probably make the mistake of writing another one eventually. As soon as the scars from the last one heal.

I also have developed a strange and disturbing attraction to the microphone. Any microphone. You may find me giving a technical talk at a developer conference or user group, or doing some standup or improv in a comedy show. I've also been seen in videos ("You may know me from such hits as DevBytes..."), either work-related or posted on my comedy blog and YouTube channel.

None of what I write in my blogs, on Google+, or anywhere else has anything to do with my employer; they're just my thoughts, my jokes, my mistakes.
Bragging rights
4, no 5, books published so far. If I lose my mind, I may write more.
Education
  • Carleton College
    Math, CS, 1983 - 1987
Work
Occupation
Graphics geek: graphics and animation software for the Android group at Google.
Employment
  • Google
    Senior Software Engineer, 2010 - present
  • Adobe Systems
    Senior Computer Scientist, 2008 - 2010
  • Sun Microsystems
    Senior Staff Engineer, 1999 - 2008
  • Micron Technology
    DirectX Drivers Mgr, 1998 - 1999
Basic Information
Gender
Male
Chet Haase's +1's are the things they like, agree with, or want to recommend.
Wordiest
market.android.com

Two words are better than one! Wordiest challenges you to make two words from 14 letters (some with bonuses attached), competing with other

Google I/O 2012
market.android.com

The official Google I/O 2012 conference companion app supports devices running Android 2.2+, and is optimized for phones and tablets of all

The Wind Through the Keyhole: A Dark Tower Novel
market.android.com

In The Wind Through the Keyhole, Stephen King returns to the rich landscape of Mid-World, the spectacular territory of the Dark Tower fantas

Lake Tahoe – Romain Guy
www.curious-creature.org

Lake Tahoe. Saturday, February 18th, 2012 at 7:23 pm, Photos. Written by Romain Guy · Bonzai Rock Sunset. A Song of Ice and Fire · Tweet · ←

Codedependent: September 2011
graphics-geek.blogspot.com - written by Chet Haase

One of the app developers here on Android asked me about the best way to animate adding and removing items from a UI Specifically he wanted to fade items in

Codedependent: Old Views Don't Die; They Just Fade Away
graphics-geek.blogspot.com - written by Chet Haase

Old Views Dont Die They Just Fade Away. One of the app developers here on Android asked me about the best way to animate adding and removing items from a UI

Public - 3 months ago
reviewed 3 months ago
1 review
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