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A reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan to a pretty girl seeking a rich husband


A young and pretty lady posted this on a popular forum:

Title: What should I do to marry a rich guy?

... I'm going to be honest of what I'm going to say here.

I'm 25 this year. I'm very pretty, have style and good taste. I wish to marry a guy with $500k annual salary or above.

You might say that I'm greedy, but an annual salary of $1M is considered only as middle class in New York.

My requirement is not high. Is there anyone in this forum who has an income of $500k annual salary? Are you all married?

I wanted to ask: what should I do to marry rich persons like you?

Among those I've dated, the richest is $250k annual income, and it seems that this is my upper limit.

If someone is going to move into high cost residential area on the west of New York City Garden(?), $250k annual income is not enough.

I'm here humbly to ask a few questions:
1) Where do most rich bachelors hang out? (Please list down the names and addresses of bars, restaurant, gym)
2) Which age group should I target?
3) Why most wives of the riches are only average-looking? I've met a few girls who don't have looks and are not interesting, but they are able to marry rich guys.

4) How do you decide who can be your wife, and who can only be your girlfriend? (my target now is to get married)

Ms. Pretty

A philosophical reply from CEO of J.P. Morgan:

Dear Ms. Pretty,
I have read your post with great interest. Guess there are lots of girls out there who have similar questions like yours. Please allow me to analyse your situation as a professional investor.

My annual income is more than $500k, which meets your requirement, so I hope everyone believes that I'm not wasting time here.

From the standpoint of a business person, it is a bad decision to marry you. The answer is very simple, so let me explain.

Put the details aside, what you're trying to do is an exchange of "beauty" and "money" : Person A provides beauty, and Person B pays for it, fair and square.

However, there's a deadly problem here, your beauty will fade, but my money will not be gone without any good reason. The fact is, my income might increase from year to year, but you can't be prettier year after year.

Hence from the viewpoint of economics, I am an appreciation asset, and you are a depreciation asset. It's not just normal depreciation, but exponential depreciation. If that is your only asset, your value will be much worse 10 years later.

By the terms we use in Wall Street, every trading has a position, dating with you is also a "trading position".
If the trade value dropped we will sell it and it is not a good idea to keep it for long term - same goes with the marriage that you wanted. It might be cruel to say this, but in order to make a wiser decision any assets with great depreciation value will be sold or "leased".

Anyone with over $500k annual income is not a fool; we would only date you, but will not marry you. I would advice that you forget looking for any clues to marry a rich guy. And by the way, you could make yourself to become a rich person with $500k annual income.This has better chance than finding a rich fool.

Hope this reply helps.

signed,
J.P. Morgan CEO
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42 comments
 
What about love ? any suggestions from Wall Street ;o),poor girl ;o)
 
Considering the poor grammar of the "CEO", I call fake.
Jay Tee
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Seen this years ago but still a good post to remind people what a "wise" investment is. Thanks for sharing.
 
Hint people. The CEO of JP Morgan is too busy picking your pockets to sit down and write a letter like this.
 
Did she tried GS... And I heard that BoA may search for some... The Loyd has lost a lot last year so... ;)
 
Maybe Barclay's... but she must sing a little ... ;)
 
All Chinese women I have met in 10 years living there, are like this "girl". For all of them marriage or any other kind of relationship is exactly as proposed by this opportunistic 25 year old nut.
In case someone from CHINA is reading, most modern Chinese women should wake up and read this, before trying to become an exceptionally depreciating asset, ;-), as most rich Chinese fools should be made aware of the honey flytrap, suck it up guys, hahaha

Dave Fritz, poor grammar or not, the analysis is perfect;-)
 
Very interesting q&a...life for money, or life for YOUR OWN LIFE with other lifes and world
 
Maybe this person would like me to forward her some of the spam emails I get every day from the millionaire dating websites.
 
Yeah sure. I bet Wall St likes to think of its self as an appreciating asset! Take away the Gov money and they would be all broke.
 
I'm pretty sure the CEO would know the correct usage of "advice" and "advise" which was incorrectly used in this response. So I call fake. The moral of the story is great, but don't falsely use someone of stature to try and make it popular or more interesting. "That's what makes the Internet stupid." -William Shakespeare 
 
Hah! He has a point. She won't be pretty for long. She treated marriage as a way of giving her services until her death (and even then, she still had the possibility of divorcing and walking away with more money). It's like she was selling herself to be a king's mistress in the old days who were used only for pleasure and not for love.
 
You're being completely honest. I'm not saying that because I'm a fat housewife with 10 cats. LOL! It's true, she's only interested in men with money, not the real person they truly are. And honestly, that's not fair to the man, he needs someone that will love him for who he is, not his money. Her beauty will fade with time, but she needs to develop a beautiful personality because when her beauty does fade, the man she marries will love her no matter what. That's my very, long opinion. :P
 
It's old and fake. I've seen this in various forms on the net for the last 15 years.
 
"I would advice that you forget" ... good to know you can be a CEO without knowing grammar.
 
Women continue to feel that much of there worth is tied up in their looks. Looks fade, men leave for younger looks. I think her letter is sad, but honest. I think the reply is sad, and also honest. When you're rich and famous, you probably wonder if people are interested in you for that; when your are physically beautiful, men will like you for that. We need to respect ourselves and each other far more than we do. Photoshopped actresses and models and pornography also continue to distort what beauty is.
 
What Forum is this LOL. And J.P. Morgan CEO replied to this... seems a little weird.
 
If that is all she offers, she doesn't bring very much to the table. What a poor sell!
 
good thing she doesn't live in Oregon...slim pickens out here for THAT tax bracket. Too bad that's all she cares about
 
Yea, he should give her an allowance, as she fades from beauty, so does her allowance, the day she opens her hand and received a pink slip, or an IOU check!
 
Broke that shyt to the ground, she'll never be able to pick her face up! Let me hit the lotto, sure we can date, i might let you put cheese on your whopper!
 
The Average salary worldwide is 1200 us dollars per year. The median income in the US is 32,500 us dollars per year! New York an L.A. are clueless how the other half lives,unless of course,you live in one of New York's World class slums-What a travesty!
 
I am pretty sure that's fake. Like my co-worker said a CEO will not the time to reply or commit so many grammatical errors, but definitely some creativity there!
 
I'm with you KD, probably fake, but I doubt they'd catch it.
 
She's looking for a connection, just of a different kind. You're taking me where and you bought me what?? Ohhhhh how I love thee so...
 
I am sorry for the random poor girl whose random pic was used in this post...lol
 
"Money for Love" versus "Love for Money". Nobody wins :-(
 
hmm that did not quite work out the way I wanted it to, buut, worth a shot, that is real art, nature's finest
 
Dishonorable Bimbette! LOL
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But Terrence, what fun 10 years they would be!
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