The avocado story was one of the parts of MFK Fisher that has most stuck with me.  

+Andy Dillon +Omari Stephens or other handy people:

I need to build or buy something of the following specifications:

I want a wooden box with a door I can padlock, with about two feet square footprint, maybe three or four feet tall.  It should provide decent protection from the elements (rain, at least) but very importantly also needs to NOT be airtight--ventilation to the outside is extremely important.  Sturdy, going to stand up to sitting on my deck ~permanently, and unlikely to be knocked over or opened by a dog or child, but resistance to actual force majeure is less important. Basically think a doghouse with a lockable door and you won't be too far off.  

Can I build this from scratch with minimal tools (I have a decent collection of hand saws/drills/etc, a basic circular saw and Dremel multitool, and similar, but not real table saws or the like) or do I need to commission this professionally?

The intended purpose is, err, a LN2 hutch.  I want a box I can leave a dewar in that will keep it from being actively rained on and make it difficult for a dog or neighbor-child to ruin their own day in a way that would make me liable, but in terms of actual security I'm not too worried (the dewar will be chained down anyway.)  One has to leave them outside and ventilated to the open air for safety  reasons, but I don't want to just sit it uncovered on my porch ~permanently.

http://firstwefeast.com/eat/this-guy-ate-chipotle-for-101-days-and-says-his-bowel-movements-are-great/?utm_campaign=complexmag+socialflow+07+2015&utm_source=facebook&utm_medium=social

WTF?  I'm pretty sure I did this during summer research, where's my article?

Can someone recommend where I can buy a do-rag, kerchief, or other useful head-covering that 

a) will fit over my massive head and poofy hair
b) will tightly restrain my hair without falling off while I roll around on a mat
c) looks not incredibly bad or silly?

(If I were better at this, I'd tie it up in tight braids or something like that but I have proved completely unable to do this in a fashion that will stay together while rolling.)

TIL I never actually learned how to mop.

Is it really not worth splashing black here for Will (and probably Demonic Tutor?)

http://www.thestranger.com/features/feature/2015/07/22/22580444/ten-years-later-the-town-of-enumclaw-still-doesnt-want-to-talk-about-you-know-what

The Stranger is a pathetically political rag, but this article is shameful beyond their normal bounds.  It's several pages of "Are those rednecks ashamed of being rednecks? No? Not even after one of them did something perverse?  What's wrong with them and their guns?"

http://www.rollingstone.com/culture/features/ben-schlappig-airlines-fly-free-20150720?page=12

http://veloclinic.com/estimating-the-probability-of-doping-as-a-function-of-power/

Argh.  No. Your prior is wrong, because Tour athletes are not, uh, normal.  They're the extreme right tail.  

I don't know if your conclusion is wrong, but it certainly not even wrong.

Martingales are awesome.  I would much rather kill a mockingbird than a martingale (but if I do kill the martingale, I'll do it at a time determined by past events with finite expectations, so it's, err, optional.)

Would you like to see what happens when modernist gourmet experts get hella high?

http://www.chefsteps.com/activities/behind-the-scenes-waffle-iron-frenzy

If your pianist can’t play the show, then he should be fired and replaced. (It could be a she, of course.) And then you should hire someone who’s up to the job. Of course, if you’re not paying very well, you may find it difficult to hire a pianist who can do it. But that’s what you should do. I’m glad you recognize that your pianist isn’t up to the gig – all too often, such incompetence passes unnoticed in the theater – but now that you’ve recognized it, it’s your job (and the job of your producer and your theater) to do everything in your power to respect the musical element of this show that you have chosen to stage and that you are charging people to attend. There is no excuse for asking an audience to sit through a bad performance.

The man does not compromise, i'll give him that.