- Tallong Auctions and Aleta's Antiques2006 - present
- Aleta's Web Designs
I'm a writer with more years’ experience in writing and editing than I admit to in public. I got into desktop publishing way early in the game, and moving into the digital space has seemed like a natural progression.
I spent more than 10 years in the corporate world, in
methods analysis (analyzing the way people do their jobs and writing
procedures), and was really good at it, but eventually decided to see if I could make a living doing more creative writing, and/or turning a hobby into a
I am also a specialist
editor for hobbies at The Citizendium, the online encyclopaedia, and I served on the Editorial Council. I also writes extensively about antiques and is a qualified Fine Art and Antiques valuer.
I'm fun, kind, sarcastic and irreverent.
A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious.
She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed.
Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.
Our representative will make you wait at the airport. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! .... You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her.. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it.
What if we have a geeky/gadgets/novelty items page? Not just another 'buy my antiques' page, Lord knows there are enough of those already, but especially for the nerdy and quirky.
I think that would be fun.
Can you do that on Twitter?